Two Worlds Distanced

Chapter 75

RACHEL

It's been a week since I have seen or heard from Ezra, and he hasn't said anything about me shoving a pair of my underwear in an envelope like if I'm a drug dealer sending drugs to the user; the thought of me doing something scandalous like that makes me kinda cringe at myself because I'm not the girl who gives her bra or panties to a man to get attention but I guess times have changed so much since graduating high school only a few months ago. But I still haven't looked at the letter so I take a breath as I open it up.

"To my beloved Rachel,

I hate myself for writing this as much as you will forever hate me for writing this but if you still want me out of your life then I will do what you asked me to do since you met me. I think we both knew that I was damaged and no good for you from that day in the airport. When I met you, I fell so deeply and unexpectedly in love with you that the deal even existed. But I knew destiny didn't want us to be together. I fought so hard not to believe it but now I know it was true. We both thought I could change yet, but I didn't; You will always be too good for me and I will always be too damaged for you to even be with you. You need someone who can bring you the moon and stars, not painful broken promises underneath endless tears the way I did multiple times, way too much that I can't look at myself without wanting to beat myself up. Now, I'm done. I'm done with making promises that I can't keep. But I never will stop loving the one person who makes me whole even when I'm broken. That will always be you. I will always love you and with that love, I need to set you free. So goodbye, pretend I didn't exist in your life. It will be better. Goodbye Rachel".

– Ezra

After reading the letter probably five times, it doesn't get any easier to make out the words on the paper with my heart breaking each time and tears streaming down my face. I shut my eyes tightly to hold tears until I can't open them, even if this was a dream I don't think I would want to believe if I'm reading this right?

The last line shoots an arrow in me, "Goodbye, pretend I don't exist in your life,", so I shove the letter to get all of my things. I need to get out of here; even though it's too late to leave work. I send an email to Lauren to tell Eric that I was feeling under the weather, then hear a knock, "Give me a minute," I wipe off the smeared mascara as I walk to the door. I opened it, "Hey Lauren. What's up?" I ask as she comes in.

"I was wondering if you want to go shopping? I need to get some bikinis," she tells me and I started laughing, "You are crazy to think about getting some bikinis when it's snowing," I tease her and she rolls her eyes in annoyance, "I know it's snowing, but I'm going to the bahamas with my boyfriend, Tyler during winter break," she point out and I scan her body which it will look so great on her body, I delice her offer and lying about the reason why I can't go because I had to study for exams. Even though I already got all of my studies finished last night as stuffing down a late night run to McDonalds.

Once getting inside of my car, I try to turn on the heater until I notice it's not working. I sign in frustration because I have had the same car since sophomore year of high school and it decides to go out; I grab my phone to go to the contracts until almost calling Ezra. He fixed my car when it wasn't working right last time. As much as I wanna call him, I wanna hear his smooth voice I can't after reading his goodbye letter. I called an Uber driver to pick me up. I had another choice. After calling the Uber, I sit in my car with the blanket I keep in the backseat of emergencies like this, why is it so fucking cold?.

...

A while later, I arrived at the library after being in the Uber car that smelled like cat pee and old fast food. Eww! I go up to the front desk with a security guard eating a glazed donut and having his feet on the desk, "Hi Alex," I greet and he jumps quickly, "You scared me, Rachel," he laughs.