saving abbie

Chapter ten

Abbie
"You knew what you were doing with that dress, Abigail" Sebastian's words churn through my head the whole way back, i'm not ready for this night to be over. Every time i look at him my heart beats faster, and my mind goes blank. All i know is that when I look at him I want him, in every way possible. This boy had single handedly given me everything I have dreamed for and more, I haven't had a PTSD blackout in over a week, i have friends now. I feel cared for.
"Seb," I say breaking the silence we have had for 20 minutes now. He looks at me,
"Can I come round your house for a bit?" My question takes him by surprise, his fingers fist the wheel tighter. His knuckles going white, his veins in his arms showing.
"That's what you want?" He replies, a question that has more than one meaning.
"It's what I want" I turn to face him, darkness fills his eyes. And he nods.

—-
"After you" He says opening the door, pressing a hand on my lower back to guide me in. His touch sends a shockwave into my body.
"Are you hungry?" He asks and i laugh.
"You just bought me food"
"You didn't eat much of it" He says shutting the door and kicking off his shoes as i do the same.
"Im not hungry" He looks at me as to say, promise me
"Im full, I promise" He sighs and nods, and walks to the kitchen. I follow him, propping myself up on the counter whilst he passes me a drink.
"Im glad you had a good time tonight," He says, moving to stand in-front of me. My eyes move down to his hands that he places beside me, right by my thighs.
"Thank you" I say as his gaze moves from where his hand is, tracing up my waist and to my face.
"Can i ask you a question?" He says, my heartbeat raising. I nod. He takes the drink out of my hands, his eyes remaining on my face as he puts it somewhere else. He grabs my hand and places it on his chest, over his heart. I can feel how fast his heart is beating, it's matching mine.
"Can you see what you do to me?" He says, his voice quieter. I go to apologise, but i don't. Instead I smile, because I want to make him nervous. I want him to feel what I feel for him, he smirks at my reaction. Eyes piercing through me.
"I guess I was right about you being trouble," He says, removing my hand from his chest and placing it on my thigh, his hand over mine. My lower stomach aches from the contact, and the idea of his hand near me.
"Do you know what I think sunflower?" He says then, his eyes placed firmly on our hands.
"I think that you like that my heart beats faster around you," He moves our hands further up my thigh,
"I think you like teasing me" His eyes shoot up to meet mine,
"Am i right?" He stares at me for a few seconds before I pull his face to meet with mine, kissing him. His hands move from my thigh and meet my face, pulling me in with desperation.
"Fuck," He says against my lips, the way he kisses me says more than words ever could. He kisses me with need, like he needs me to be here with him. His hands leave my face trailing down my body and reaching my hips. With ease, this man picks me up off the counter and I wrap my legs around him causing him to moan quietly, I stop kissing him for a moment knowing what I want.
"What's wrong, baby?" He says, reaching a hand to my face meaning he is carrying me with one arm. jesus.
"Take me to your room" I reply, lust fills his eyes.
"We don't have to if you don't want to-"
"Take me to your room" He nods and than kisses me, whilst he walks me to his room. He opens the door and places me on the bed gently, before touching the dress I have on.
"This, Off" He says, causing the butterflies in my stomach to erupt. I take it off, thanking myself that I wore my favourite set today. Part of me wishing this would happen. He stands over me as i lay on his bed in only my bra and thong, admiring what he see's. Usually, i would feel insecure. But with the way he's staring at me I feel like the hottest girl in the world.
"Your so fucking sexy" He says about to move on top of me, I stop him and grab his shirt.
"Off" I say and he smiles.
"That's my girl" He replies taking off his shirt, to reveal a body I was not expecting him to have. This man was pure fucking muscle, and I loved every bit of it. He than climbs on top of me firstly kissing me mouth, moving his way down to my neck.
"Flip over" He says, grabbing my waist and assisting me. He kisses my back, reaching my bra strap and undoing it. With his mouth. He undoes it and slides it off, flipping me back over.
"Jesus christ, Abbie" He says, kissing all of me again.
"Seb-" I say as he licks my nipple, causing him to look up at me and smile.
"You like that?" He replies, moving down and kissing my stomach like he's planned how and where he wants me. As he reaches further down I just need him more and more. Every part of me. Craving him. His finger slips under the beginning of my thong and he looks up at me for confirmation,
"Do anything you want, please" I say and within seconds my thong is off and on the floor.
"Is there anything wrong with you?" He says, on his knees at the end of the bed kissing my inner thighs. Many.
He teases me for what feels like an eternity before he reaches my clit causing magic with his tounge,
"Oh my god" I say, my body moving as he presses my lower stomach holding me down.
"Im just getting started, baby" He said, carrying on casting spells inside of me. He pumps a finger in and out of me, causing me to see and taste colours i've never known before.
"Seb-" I scream as I finish, and he just looks at me.
"I love the way you say my name" He says moving back up towards me, his eyes searching my face for anything but the big smile he's put on it.
"But I love this pretty face more" He says, kissing me softly, my eyes close slightly as tiredness hits me like a truck.
"Lets clean you up and you can sleep, yeah?" He says in the most caring tone i've ever heard.
"But seb you haven't-" I say as he kisses my collarbone,
"I wanted to make you feel good, your tired we have time" He says and i smile. Because honestly? I need sleep. He gets out of the bed and cleans me up softly, passing me one of his t shirts to wear.

Love is a word too scary to use this soon, it's a word i've assume i've known what it means. But this? This is the closest i have ever got and i am falling for him. More than I know. He's left me alone for a minute and I can't help but feel a wave of sadness come over me, because I can't share this with her. I can't share these feelings with her, and I want too. I want to tell her about Matt and Ri and that I went to see our favourite artist. I want everything to be with her, but it can't be. And i think i'm starting to make peace with that thought. Slowly.

He walks back in the room quietly to see if im asleep and when he realises i'm not he gets in the bed next to me, i turn to face him.
"Hi" I say and he smiles,
"Hi, baby" He replies and kisses me on the forehead, i feel a tear roll down my cheek and he stops it with his thumb, worry spreading across his face.
"Im okay" I whisper quickly,
"I just, when things that are important to me happen it makes me miss her a little bit more you know?" He nods,
"My mom would've loved you" He says quieter. How have I not realised, "My mom went insane"
"Seb-"
"She killed herself Abbie" My heart drops.
"W-what?" i manage to strangle out. His hand grabs mine like he needs to know i'm going to stay for what he's going to say next.
"They loved each other, my dad and mom. They were the type of parents that loved each other more than me, it wasn't love I realise now. It was painful and self destructive- they would argue all the time and then forgive in a constant cycle and i just felt like the side character in their story" He breaths in, a tear releasing from his eye. I move my face closer to his, kissing him softly.
"You can tell me" I say, grabbing his hand and putting it on my heart. He carry's on.
"He died, and It was so out of the blue that she didn't expect it. She couldn't comprehend that this world could exist without him in it, so she left me a note that said my uncle would sign for custody and left. That was a year and 20 days ago"
"Seb, im so sorry I didn't know" I reply, my heart crushing for him. No parents and he still wanted to make me happy after my sister passed, there are people in this world that are angels. Angels sent to us for reasons we don't know, but all we do know is life is a lot better with them. Seb is my angel.
"Your so strong," I say causing him to loose eye contact with me.
"There aren't many people as kind as you Seb, I want you to look at me" He doesn't.
"Look at me" He lifts his head slowly, eyes red.
"You have helped me in more ways you can imagine. 9 days seb, You said one month and all you needed was 9 days to make me see things can change. You did that, okay?" He nods and pulls me to his chest, playing with my hair.
"Thank you, sunflower" Are the last words I hear before i fall asleep.

WOOOOOOO