WARNING: Triggering!!!!
Also the song at the top is called Self Conclusion by The Spill Canvas. This song is just so special to me and well.... I just kinda relate to it sometimes.
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Lexi pov
As I sit in the bathroom I look at myself in the mirror. I'm so ugly. I always had self confidence in myself when I was younger but now I've just lost it all. I look down at the tiny blade and take in the scene. A huge sink and a tiny blade. A whole canvas of skin and little cuts all on it. People think I'm so happy. All my friends think I can handle Kellin but....... I can't. I always have that smile on my face and that laugh when I need it. Just it's never really real. I look down at the bandaids. Four. I got four. Why you may ask. Because who knows how many times I'll cut. I look in the mirror one more time saving my image in my mind. My face all red. Makeup running down my cheeks. My lips blood red from biting them. (IF YOU GET TRIGGERED EASILY PLEASE DO NOT READ I DO NOT WANT TO MAKE YOU GUYS SAD.) I slide down the door and pick up the blade. I look at my wrist and see it's healing. So I leave it alone. I look at my thigh and slowly drag the blade in the same spot the other new fresh cuts are. I wince since I'm still not used to this. I look at my wrist tempted but don't. I suddenly start cutting faster and the faster the cut the faster the blood. Suddenly I cut deep and that's when I stop. I put a bandaid on my thigh and sigh. (You may read.) I grab a wash cloth and wash my face sighing in relief. I open the door and walk into my room still feeling the stinging but remembering I deserve it for making Calum sad and for making Kellin hate me so much. So much for being a week clean. I think and fall on my bed and look out my window staring at the world wanting it to all end. Sooner or later I fall asleep not caring about anything or hear my phone ringing.
Dylan pov
"Buckle up." I hear Kellin say as we get in the car. "No." I say and he rolls his eyes. A couple minutes later I look at Kellin furiously as he drives with a clenched jaw. "I was about to punch him." I say through gritted teeth. "I know and I pulled you away." He says still staring at the road. "Why?" I ask my jaw now clenched. "Because you about to beat Maria's best friend." "So?" I ask. He looks at me. "So?" He scoffs. "You love her." He says and I look at him gaping. "Do not!" I yell and he stops the car slamming me forward. "Should've wore you seat belt." He says. "Fuck you." I say. "That's what you'd do to Maria." He says and gets out. "I don't want to fuck that slut." I say my heart breaking. "Really? Usually you want to fuck everyone." "Not that hoe Lexi." I say as we walk into his room. He slams me against the wall. "Don't you fucking say that or I'll fucking break your face." Kellin growls. "Really now?" I smirk testing him. "Why would you care? She's just a-" Before I finish he punches me in the jaw and I look at him. "You wanna stop?" He asks and I laugh. "Yeah." Suddenly I get a phone call and see it's our friend Johnnie. This should be interesting. "Hello?" I answer. "Yo party at my place 8?" He asks. "We'll be there." Kellin says taking the phone from me. "See you then." He says. "The hell?!" I yell. "This is for saying she was a hoe." He says talking about Lexi and walks out of the room. Okay then I need to clean up. I think noticing it's 6:30. I walk into the bathroom and start the shower. Maybe Maria will be there. Who knows.
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Wow. Okay so my penguins I hope you like it and I will see you guys soon! Peace Tea life's a bitch don't quit and Johnnie Guilbert is bae 😍✌️
YOU ARE READING
Falling in love with an asshole
Hayran Kurgu(Maria' P.O.V) When I was growing up all the time my parents would warn me about drugs, strangers, alcohol, and drug dealers. But they never warned me about the boy with brown eyes and a heartbeat. (Lexi's P.O.V) All my life, people have told me not...
