Jake has a lover from the past, though he remembers her in this life too. She was his reasons for all inspiration, his work of art, and his to bring him pain. Yet what separates them was this new life.
When he does manages to find her, will she reco...
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» [Nothing's gonna hurt you baby by Cigarettes after sex] « 1:21 ─〇───── 4:46 ⇄ ◃◃ ⅠⅠ ▹▹ ↻
Jake felt miserable. He'd thought that all he's ever known this whole time without you was miserable, but finding you, and losing you again introduced him to a new pit of despair. It was like going through the deepest depths of fiery hell every day when he would wake up, because he would see the painting of your face hung across his bed, and remember how you slipped right through his fingers again. And the worst part? he let you, let it all happen.
It was because Jake didn't stay away, because he asked you out, because he kissed you, because he told you he was in love with you. And he is, still is. He's been in love with you for longer than he thought was possible, the memory of your body on top of his forever ingrained in his brain, refusing to leave his mind, the echo of the touch of your hand against his face still sends shivers down his spine. But, those feelings are not something you would understand, and he shouldn't have said any of it. He should have acted like he was just meeting you for the first time.
Now it's all gone. The magic is gone, the spell is broken, and you're never going to remember your life with him. Not only that, but you never want to even see him again. You were firm in your text, which came out of the blue for him. Well, Jake did notice that you looked uncomfortable when he told you he was in love with you, you did bid him goodnight in the next minute or so, and you gave him a quick hug before disappearing—but he wasn't expecting you to cut him off entirely like this.
The next morning, he read your text, reread it a couple times, and his heart sank to his feet.
You: i'm sorry, Jake. i had a good time with you, but it seems you feel a lot more for me than i do for you. i don't want to lead you on. i think we shouldn't see each other again. thank you for everything, i am sorry!
Jake didn't respond to you, he couldn't. He broke down when he read the text, feeling like his entire life was taken away from him again. You were right there, and then you weren't. Jake refused to say goodbye over text or at all. It wasn't something he wanted to do, ever.
If he texted you and tried to explain he loved you, you would block him, and he'd never be able to contact you again, even if he needed you badly. Goodbyes seemed final, so he never said a thing, letting you have the last word, removing himself from the situation gracefully. Thankfully, you couldn't see him cry his heart out that morning or that afternoon, or so many nights after that, when he'd stare at the painting and cry over you and everything you could have had.
