Wishes (Ellie Williams)

Chapter 9- Thoughts

Lily was in the shower for probably an entire hour scrubbing herself and rewashing her hair three times, brushing her teeth in the shower over and over again. She shaved her body probably twice in a row. It was euphoria to say the least. She hadn't felt this good and this clean since Bill and Franks.

She stepped out of the shower and wiped the mirror off. She couldn't remember the last time she actually saw herself. She looked completely different but completely the same all at once.

Her hair was still the golden red it always was, but now reached her belt again instead of resting just below her ribs. Her skin was still fair but it looked rough and dirty even though she had just showered. Her eyes were still the green they always were but they looked darker, even though they weren't. Her freckles were more prominent then she remember them ever being. She didn't have to many of them, but the ones she did have scattered around her face were darker.

She was skinner. Not by a lot. She was never overweight, but she remembered herself being at least a little thicker then she was now as she glanced at herself. Her cheek bones stood more prominent on her face, her stomach was more toned, more flat. Probably from the not eating as much as she should be but she didn't care.

She had more scars littered around her body then she recalled, what freaked her out though was her chest was growing, she didn't like it. Sure she had expected it to happen, but she didn't want it to. It meant she was actually growing up now, even though she's had a period since she was 13.

She looked older in ways that a 15 year old shouldn't be looking older in.

She huffed at her reflection before covering herself in a robe that hung on the door of the bathroom after drying herself, she began searching for scissors in the drawers and to her surprise actually found some.

So she again began to carefully cut her hair so it would rest below her ribs, feeling satisfied with the cut she scrunched her hair in the towel over and over again before she let it air dry as she stepped out of the bathroom.

Glancing at the bed she saw Maria had left black leggings and baggy black jeans along with a new bra, a tight fitting white long sleeve paired with a brown t shirt and a big thick black zip up. Also with thick snow boots and a newish pair of black converse.

She nodded at the clothes, happy with Maria's choices as she began dressing herself.

When she was done she sighed and fell back for a second on the bed resting one of her hands on her stomach and the other finding it way to her cat who slept soundly on the bed.

She had come to the decision that she was going to ask Maria to look after him once her Joel and Ellie set off again, she couldn't have anything happen to him and she figured they would come back after completing whatever it was they were going to do.

She didn't want to part from her cat, but it's safer for him here, she didn't have to worry about him going hungry either.

She stood up and began looking around the room, going through the empty drawers and looking in the empty closet looking at the wall colors and the small but pretty wall art someone had hung here long ago.

She noticed something on the desk and went over the look at it.

She furrowed her eyebrows as she picked up the paper that went with it, looking at the picture instructions. Her mouth hung open for a second after realizing what it was. She put the paper down and picked up the small rubber cup bending it and looking at it with curious and disgusted but also grateful eyes.

"So weird" she mumbled to herself before putting it in her bag and sitting down again. She chose to put her ear buds in and listen to her Walkmans music, something she hadn't had the chance to do in a while.