Beloved Dear, Look At Me For Once | ✔

Chapter Seven

Translation:

Khun: Formal and polite of mentioning someone in Thai, be it known or unknown.

Trigger warning: Usage of words "die" And "kill"

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Walking aimlessly on the same streets like he always did, Tay recalled every single last moment,

Not only of just these past three months but of his whole life,

Faint memories of his mom cooking while humming to her favorite song as he would be drawing cars, trees and butterflies sitting on the ground nearby the entrance to the kitchen,

His father always bringing her flowers and him toys or anything like that when his mother and he would least expect it.

Although his mother would scold his father telling him to not to spend on things like these, her happiness would literally shine from her eyes and smile as his father would look like he had fallen in love all over again.

He also remembered playing in the dirt with his childhood friend Singto, and being dragged away by his mother to come study for exams.

Then he remembered his school's annual function where his class had won the third place making his parents' joy go over the moon as his mother had then peppered him with kisses which he had wiped away the very next moment whining that he was a big boy now but content with the fact that he was their little rockstar.

He also remembered how his mother had fallen ill after an unexpected miscarriage and had never recovered from it,

"The results aren't looking that good."

He remembered being freshly fourteen and standing right behind his parents in the doctor's office, they were supposed to be celebrating his birthday but here they were his mother getting diagnosed with second stage ovarian cancer.

He remembered how his parents, especially his mother, had been very strong regardless every single thing and smiling everyday, just for him, even though things were getting hard each passing day,

He had taken it up on himself to take his mother to chemotherapy whenever he could and give medicine to her before and after school, yet, his mother wasn't getting better no matter the rounds of chemo and how many medication she was on,

And his father, who was slowly getting crushed under the pile of debts he had taken upon himself, had only lived once he had come back home to see his dear wife and only son laughing over some silly TV show.

Then a month before his fifteenth birthday, he had remembered the grey clouds and the drizzle, the scent of incense and standing in the monastery, in front of his mother's smiling picture aching his numb heart.

He had seen his family fall apart just like that.

His father reducing himself to work and spending hours of solitude in his room in all the free time he got and him?

He had to pretend everything's okay in front of his school mates, he understood perfectly that he couldn't ruin everyone's mood everyday,

But it had led to him crying himself to sleep almost every night.

Until one night, he remembered, it was a night just like the other where he was silently crying himself to sleep and the door to his room had clicked open as he had quickly wiped away tears and had acted like he was deep asleep,

It had taken a long while before the door had clicked shut as he had thought that his father had gone back to his room and silent tears had slipped out of his eyes once again,