Death's Silence ||Tyunning Story||

VII

19.11.2013
15:00 PM

It's been a month since I met Soobin and I got quite scared by the fact that I love Kai... My best friend since kids!
Am I actually in love with him? Do I really love a boy? Do I really love my best friend? Wait... If that so... Does he love me back?
Those question hunts me for the past month, I tried to avoid Kai as much as I could even if it hurts both, I needed to know what's happening with me and to clear my mind about it.
But now I finally made up my mind, I love Kai and I'd do anything for him, tomorrow I'm going to tell him!
But first my family needs to know too.
<<Mom! Dad! Seohyun noona! I need to tell you something!>> I call them in the living room excitedly to tell them what I feel, I'm swinging on my feet for how nervous I am.
"Okay sweetie, tell us!" Says my mom, sitting on the couch with my dad and sister, encouraging me.
<<Well... I kinda like someone in school>> I say a bit shy to reveal it all already... Why am I so nervous?!
"Wait... You like someone?!" Asks mocking me my sister.
"Oh! Well who is it?" Asks my mom.
"Is she cute?" Asks my dad smirking.
<<Well... It's not a she...>> I start and my parents looks a bit suspicious. <<It's Kai! I-I l-love Kai>> I stutter.
My parents look at each other and I feel suffocating for how tense the situation is... Did I do something wrong? Is it okay for a boy to love another boy? A friend loving a friend?
"Taehyun... Son... You can't love Kai" Says my dad cautiously and I look at him confused.
<<Why?>> I ask him.
"Because he's a boy! And you too! Two boys can't be together, if they do they're probably ill!" Says my mom and I look at her even more confused than before... Am I ill? Nah! Why should I be? We are talking about Kai! Of course I love Kai!
I see my sister looking at them disgusted "Ill?! Why? They really look cute together! I mean of course they would end up falling in love at some point! They're always together! Plus Kai is literally an angel, I'm happy they're finally realizing their feelings!" Says my sister and I'm so grateful for her right now.
<<Mom I don't care if I'm ill... I love Kai and I want him!>> I say firmly and right after my dad slaps me really hard on my face.
"Don't you ever raise your voice like that to your mother! And you won't love a boy! That's final!" Yells my dad and I fall on the floor crying, for the strength of the slap.
"Dad!" Shouts my sister, trying to stop him.
"Go to your room and mind your business!" Scolds her my dad, she looks at me sadly.
"I'm sorry" She says.
<<It's okay>> I whisper trying to smile to comfort her.
"Go to your room!" Yells my mom at her and she runs away.
<<Too late dad! I already love a boy! And even if I'm young I would give him all my life!>> I answer him getting angry, staring into his eyes.
Then my mother grabs my ear pulling me up from the ground and I wince in pain.
"You ungrateful son! We are trying to protect you and give you a better future and you thank us with this nonsense!" She slaps me as well on the other cheek, I don't even have time to breathe that my dad drags me on the floor by the collar of my shirt.
I fall hitting the vase of flowers and all the shards pierce into my skin, I grin my teeth in pain letting out a groan.
"My flowers!" Yells my mom pulling out her slipper and hitting my body that's already bleeding for the cuts.
"Look what you got! You're been ungrateful to your mother, destroying this household, dishonoring this family... Your family! You ungrateful fagot shit!" Yells my dad, at every insults a hit, a punch, a slap, a kick.
Blood slowly dirtying the floor under me, my vision gets blurry and darker, my focus comes and goes without fixing on anything in particular, I feel my sense drifting away from me, my eyes close a couple of times telling me I'm losing my senses.
Everything hurts, from my body to my soul... My family hates me more than anything just because I love a boy with my whole heart.
"Now stand your flat ass up and clean this mess! You shit!" Scolds my dad giving me one last slap on the face and blood also comes out from my cheek and nose.
I try with all my might to stay conscious and after a few minutes of my parents still yelling I start to slowly stand up.
A piercing pain hits my body still covered in blood.
<<Ah!>> I scream trying to breathe, I pick up the pieces of the vase and the withered flowers from the floor throwing them away.
"Now go to your room! And I don't want to see you with that Kai ever again!" Roars my dad.
"I wish I never had you... I disown you... You're not my son anymore" Says my mom and I run away in my room.
I close myself in and I let myself cry watching Kai's window at the other side, I can hear the soft, malinconic melody he's playing with his piano.
<<I just love you... That's it! I swear>> I whisper between my sobs <<Please love me back... At least you please love me>> I say covering my face with my hands being careful with where I lay them.
My door opens revealing my sister "Taehyun! Oh my god! Stay there I go get the medical kit and bandaids and I'll be back" She runs in the bathroom and comes back.
"Take your shirt off, this is gonna hurt, but it's for the better" Says my sister and I do what she tells me, removing my shirt so that she can remove the shreds of porcelain from my body.
I grind in pain at every piece while she gently disinfect the scratches and wipes my blood.
<<Why are you taking care of me? I'm not your brother anymore... I'm just a fucking idiot>> I say heavily breathing and she looks at me surprised.
"What the hell are you talking about?! You are my brother and I don't care what mom and dad say! You haven't done anything wrong! You're not ill and I'm proud of you! I wish I was as brave as you are!" She says cleaning my cuts.
"Tomorrow is better you stay here, I'll protect you, but when you'll feel better go and get that boy!" She says and I smile hugging her, still feeling pain all over my body.
<<I love him so much, thank you>> I smile at her.
"Of course! I'm your noona after all!" She jokes and we both laugh.

What would I do without my sister! She's my lifeline and I love her so much for everything she did... Even if sometimes we fight and even if I can't contact her anymore... I'm dead for her... For everyone.