ᴀʟʟ ɪ ᴡᴀɴᴛ ɪꜱ ᴛᴏ ʙᴇ ꜰʀᴇᴇ - regulus black

chapter 23

Octavia wasn't herself anymore. She had been aching for a long time, but she had never felt this worse. 

"Octavia, are you feeling alright? You seem a little weird these days," wondered Lilah, one evening, as she, Octavia, Zephyr and Jaden were sitting all together doing homework.

"I'm just tired and I'm thinking about the holidays. That's all don't worry," she replied, offering up a smile that she hoped would wave off her friend's worries.

But the frown of worry wouldn't leave her face and she could feel the boys' eyes on her as well. "Really guys, I'm okay." And then, she tried focusing back on her DADA book even though she had been reading the same page for the last ten minutes.

She really didn't need her friends to worry about her. She didn't want to, nobody had to know about her current state, there was so many things people already had to worry about. It was something that concerned her and only her, and something she would deal with alone as to not bother anyone. 

Later that night, when people were either chatting or doing some homework in the common room after dinner, Felix came to Octavia. The girl was lying on a sofa facing the crackling fire, fighting off sleep. The place was warm, and it felt good on her. Feeling Felix sitting, and crushing her feet in the process, brought back energy in her.

"What the hell you fat arse!"

"If you were sitting this wouldn't happen! This is not a bed here!" he replied back and they started glaring at each other before she turned her face again to watch the fire. 

"I've heard from Lilah you didn't seem okay these days," he told her in a small voice after a while.

"Nonsense," curtly said the girl. 

"She knows you better than anyone and this is not nonsense," said her brother, his voice sounding rather strict. 

Octavia sighed loudly at this. She especially hated worrying her little brother. He had other things to care about that weren't his stupid depressed older sister. 

"It's just silly things, you don't need to hear about this."

"But I want to. If Evan is not here to take care of you, I'm the one who has to take the job."

She chuckled at this, feeling genuinely touched. "Who do you think you are? Who's the eldest here? I'm the one supposed to take care of my younger brother."

"If you can't do so, the roles are reversed," rejoined the boy while hitting her thigh playfully.

"Ouch you wanker!" 

"Shut up! Tell me what's wrong."

"I thought I had to shut up," she answered cheekily, a large grin forming on her lips as she turned her eyes to look at him.

"You know what I mean!" he huffed, rolling his eyes.

"I said it was stupid-"

"Whatever tell me," he insisted.

"I'll tell you something but promise you won't get mad." She waited for him to nod his head to continue. "Well... I contacted Max and... it didn't go well," she confessed.

Her eyes were now fixing the ceiling of this marvelous common room, trying to not let out any tear. 

"And there's Regulus, I think he doesn't like me anymore. I just feel rejected by everyone, nobody wants me, I feel so useless."

It was silent for a while. Felix turned his head around to notice three pairs of eyes looking in their direction, and then he looked back at his sister, trying to regain her composure.