Ephemeral

Hematoma

I was couldn't stop my constant nibbling of the skin around my left thumb, and my father looked wearily at the door of my sister's hospital room – he was waiting to be informed on my sister's progress just as much as I was. I, however, looked despondently at the ground, shaking my body forward and back subtly. There was a dreadful, nauseous feeling that took a lethal hold of me – it rooted itself deep inside and remained there as my heart skipped a few beats every couple of minutes.

Not being able to do anything –

It fucking sucked.

Rafael ran into the room, out of breath as he slipped an arm through his white coat.

"I just heard about what happened..." Rafael began to say, though he couldn't say anything else.

My father quickly stood up and sprinted towards the doctor while I could only see what was happening out of the corner of my eyes. I breathed in and out, doing my best to remain calm and not start panicking –

It was hard to do.

It was a terrifying, unpredictable waiting game.

"Please," My father responded out of breath. "I-Is there any update-?"

My father never looked so desperate and fearful in his entire life. Rafael didn't immediately respond to his question as he searched my father's eyes. Ultimately, the doctor shook his head, causing my father to slump his shoulders.

"They are still in surgery," Rafael spoke calmly. "Her heart has undergone stress and our best cardio surgeon is on the case..."

I heard his words --

I heard his words but...I didn't believe them.

This was my sister that they were talking about – the toughest girl that I knew. There was no way that she had a weak heart – there was absolutely no fucking way that an infection is what would take her out.

"Is there anything I can get for the two of you?" Rafael asked, exchanging looks between my father and I.

I lifted my head and stared straight at him.

I didn't want to sugarcoat my reply to him at all and wanted to direct all my anger, hate, and resentment towards someone. It wasn't my fault that my sister had an infection...clearly, this was because of the hospital and its staff. They weren't careful enough and didn't monitor her closely – if they had then this wouldn't have happened --

My sister wouldn't be suffering.

"You can get out..." I icily stated.

"Arianna-!" My father lectured me for how rude I was being, snapping his head to admonish me some more.

Rafael stared over at me and frowned as he nodded his head in what appeared to be understanding. I didn't know if my cold glare that was directed at him was any indication that I hated his guts. I trusted him and the people that he worked with to take care of my sister.

If she didn't pull out of this –

If she didn't live then...

I didn't know what I'd do.

"I'll let the floor nurses know to stand by for you..." Rafael responded as he began to walk out of the room before he stopped himself as his hand slammed onto the doorway. It caused my father to look over at the doctor. Rafael's head was bowed and he didn't turn to look back at us with his next words: "I will be overseeing the rest of this surgery personally."