Phoenix - A Zutara Titanic AU

Chapter 3: Clarity

Fire Lord Ozai kept to himself. He spent most of his time on the ship in his study, reading and writing letters to and from his council back in the capital. He had servants managing a complex network of messenger hawks which was temporarily serving as his only means of communication with his country, and they had to carefully plan every bird's route to avoid interception, lest the inner workings of the Fire Nation government be exposed to anyone outside their tight circle of associates. The circumstances were dangerous enough to warrant the Fire Lord overseeing the process himself in addition to his usual duties. This kept him busy and slightly on edge, and his children were practically ignored.

Zuko told himself that he would rather not be around his father while he was stressed. Could that be considered disrespectful? Then Zuko told himself he wished his father would spend some time with him. Did that make him ungrateful? Zuko had a habit of shooting a glance at Azula whenever he harbored these sorts of conflicting thoughts. He wished he would stop; every time he looked at her, she had those same calculating eyes, that same self-assured posture, the same subtle hint of a smirk playing on her lips. He caught himself longing to talk to her. He could hardly fathom why. He knew she would only belittle him with every opportunity, but he still wanted to speak with her so badly it ached.

Once, he caught her alone by the outdoor pool at sunrise, practicing an advanced firebending form. Usually he hated watching her practice, but there was something about the wind in his hair and the roar of the waves and the soft, tranquil light of the early morning that compelled him to stay and watch. She was flawless, graceful, and precise; every tiny shift served a purpose, and not a single movement was out of place. Even the slightest twitch of a finger was intentional, perhaps to adjust the production of flames for peak efficiency. Such perfection was as disconcerting as it was beautiful. Zuko waited for his sister's proficiency to turn into a source of self-loathing, but instead, an unexpected sadness settled into his chest. He didn't know where it came from or why, but he couldn't bear to be either bitter or impressed as he watched her immaculately perform moves that he had never been able to master. He just felt sad. It was only when Azula acknowledged his presence and sent him a snarky quip that the usual self-loathing returned.

That afternoon, Zuko was coerced into joining Azula, Mai, and Ty Lee in the pool. Although the royal family suite was exclusive to outsiders, even first class guests, Mai and Ty Lee were permitted to enter and use most of its facilities. Admittedly, it was nice to have their own private pool away from the other first-class passengers who would have shamelessly kissed up to the royal siblings if they got the chance. The ability to avoid people has been Zuko's only comfort as of late, so as conflicted as he was about inhabiting an exclusive royalty lodging, he was grateful for the numerous quiet spaces where he could be alone. Even when attending a pool party of sorts with Azula's friends outdoors, he was still hidden from the prying eyes of Fire Nation nobility and the rest of the general public.

Zuko and Azula arrived at the pool to find that Mai and Ty Lee were already there, lounging on a pair of bamboo poolside recliners. Azula, as usual, felt the need to exert her control and demanded they get up immediately. "We're playing volleyball," she declared, in the tone of voice that didn't allow for any disagreement. She ordered a few servants to set up the net so that it hung across the middle of the pool, and Zuko couldn't help cringing slightly at how they scampered away when Azula dismissed them.

Because there were only four players, they decided to forego assigning positions, instead simply splitting themselves into teams of two; Azula paired with Ty Lee, leaving Zuko with Mai. They would play to twenty-one points for three sets, and the first to win two sets won the match. Zuko hadn't played since he was twelve and was very out of practice, but the rules and techniques all came back to him after the first few rallies. He had height to his advantage, which he didn't remember always being the case—in fact, he'd been a bit shorter than the girls during those awkward years when girls started sprouting up before the boys even hit puberty—but now, he was at least a few inches taller than the rest of them, and that combined with a longer wingspan increased his range of attack. He also had raw power, aggressiveness, and agility, the latter of which Ty Lee undoubtedly eclipsed but he was still a faster swimmer.