violet gallagher // shameless

59- you're okay

kev and v brought us home that night and it was like 4 am when i walked into our house through the back door.

i turned to v. "can you bring carl and debs to bed? i gotta talk to lip." i asked her after seeing lip sitting on the couch filling out some paper. 

"of course, baby." she said smiling at me. 

"thanks v." i smiled back and gave her a quick hug. before entering the living, she hold me back. 

"it's gonna be alright. liam's strong. he's gonna manage it." she said and i nodded. 

"i know. god is with him. he's gonna make it." i answered as she pulled me into another but tighter hug. 

after she let go i waved back at her while entering the living room. 

"where the hell where you?" i asked, standing infront of him but he just ignored me. "lip. you should have been there. what's that?" i asked pointing at the paper. 

"admissions paperwork. insurance? none. employer? none. credit card number? none. jesus." he finally talked to me. "maybe they'll let us wash dishes in the cafeteria."

"nah, fuck that. they'll still treat him." 

"well  they'll send a collection acency our way." 

"what? you're worried about fucking up your credit rating? lip, our baby brother just drowned in cocaine!" i felt the anger rising up in me. 

he just shrugged and kept writing. i knew how sad and shocked he was about the whole liam thing but he didn't want to show it. 

i sighted angily. "fiona's bail hearing is around noon sometime, kev left a message with that lawyer."

"fuck no!" lip snapped at me. "lawyers don't work for free!" 

"kev said that him and v are gonna front us some cash." 

"cash? are you fucking kidding me? as if we'll ever be able to pay that shit back!" he started really raising his voice at me. but what he can do, i can do better. 

"she needs a fucking lawyer lip! she just got arrested! what the fuck!" 

"she'll get one. the PD's office will handle it." 

"are you fucking kidding me?! an overworked public defender straight outta law school?!" 

"works for me." he shrugged.

i felt the anger boiling in me. "it was a fucking accident lip!" i yelled. 

"if you say so." he just said.

"this is not just her fucking fault! we all were there, including you. don't act like you couldn't have watched him! you where the the entire fucking time! why do you keep telling yourself that it's only fiona's fault when it isn't! and not just that! after fiona being arrested you just split! you're the second oldest in this household, acting like a 6 year old child! how could you just leave me there with the weight on my 17 year old shoulders?!" i shouted at him. "you should've been there but you weren't! how could you!?" 

lip stood up to look more dangerous or some shit and then starting to yell at me as well. "well, violet, it's almost 5 in the morning and i've got a quantum physics quiz in three hours. i don't wanna miss that only because fiona fucked up! open you're fucking eyes violet! it was her coke laying around and she is liam's guardian so it is her job to watch him! not mine and not yours or anyone else's!" 

"what the fuck lip!" i shouted. "you don't have to be a legal guardian of someone to watch them! grow the fuck up! also this isn't just about whose fault it is or who should have watched liam, it is also about being there for him now! he's four fucking years old and he needs us! so if you mind caring about your family?! and yes i still want you to go to college and participate in those tests but be here for your family and stop blaming fiona!" i yelled, turned around and stormed out of the house.