It's back again
That nausea
The one I've had for 2 years straight
Only remedied by sleep
And self care
And my mind deciding that it's ok
The dread
So thick I can taste it
As it clogs my pores
Poor me
I want to wail
But I can't
That's not who I am
I detest appearing weak
I detest NEEDING someone
So I don't
When I do
Because I don't know what to do
I never really had a goal in life
I let it pass me by
I never lived it
Others lived it for me
And I dealt with the emotional
Bullshit their decisions lead to
No more
I have to decide
I have to want to LIVE
Because I'm not living
I never was
I was barely alive
I was there
A vessel
No dreams for the future after
High school
I was broken
I still am
But not as broken as I was
And I want to be whole again
I want to be human
I want to be
ALIVE
YOU ARE READING
A Mental Trip
PoetryThe poems of a depressed nonbinary POC throughout high school, into college, and through first loves and toxic relationships. Hopefully, this shows people that they are not alone in their pain and that there can be something better on the other si...
