If I were in My Hero Academia- Redo

1

Monday
As I watched the episode of my hero academia, a portal opened up in my room.
" What the fuck is that?" I wondered " it probably won't matter in a few seconds, because I'll probably be dead"
Then the portal started talking.
" Get the fuck in here" the portal called out to me.
" Okay, whatever you say Mr portal man"
I hopped in the portal. I was doing spins and flips and loopy loops. Whatever happened to me always getting motion sick?
This was the worst time you could possibly be wearing a tank top and shorts on. Oh well, it's not like any pervert will be in a building made out of glass, right?
" Hey kid! Who are you, and how'd you get past security?" A voice called from behind me.
" Are you all-might? You look like a greasy grandma that her grandson forgot to put anti-raisin cream on"
" Excuse me?" All-might said.
" Oh shit, wait, where am I exactly?"
" You're in UA high?" All-might replied.
" Hey pretty girl, wanna go to my house after school?" A deformed grape asked me.
" Yeah, no. You'll probably touch my tits. And plus, I'm only eleven years old"
" ELEVEN?!" A loud voice called out.
" Present Michael, go put yourself in a hole" I said.
" Who's she? Is she new?" Todoroki asked.
" No, I'm probably hallucinating from eating a tin of Altoids in under five minutes"
" You're in UA high school. Look out the window" All-might said.
" Holy cow"
Everything was there, just as it had been in the show.
"By the way, none of this explains how you got past security" all-might reminded me.
" I got teleported here from the comfort and safety of my own room through a purple portal that told me to get the fuck In it"
" Odd"
" No shit Sherlock"
" Who's this extra?"
" Who's this self absorbed and temperamental baby that's calling me an extra?"
" I like your personality, I'm Bakugou"
" I'm Aria, finally someone here isn't clinically insane"
" None of us are clinically insane?"
" Well, midoriya, judging by your high pitched voice, ratty nest in your head, and notebooks containing everything about everyone, you were bullied as a kid. Your obviously wielding some crazy quirk that's too much for your body"
" Okay, how did you just guess my entire life? What's your name? I need to put this in my notebook!"
" Freak. Anyways, who's next?"
" Ooh, do Mr Aizawa, I bet you can't guess his"
" What about me?"
" I'm from the future, I can guess your whole life"
" Try me,"
" Judging by your rats' nest, you are obviously depressed and have a major drinking problem. You take antidepressants, which you try to hide by keeping them in a drawer in your desk, and you're colorblind. You're also gay as hell. You probably are dating a coworker right now, probably one that starts with a-"
" yay, you guessed my whole life, I'm going back to sleep"
" Do me. As class president, I-"
" Ah, Ida. I don't know anything about you, other than watch your back, alright?"
" Okay?"
" I'm done taking questions. Now I'm leaving"
" Wait, what are those scars on your arms and legs?"
" I have cats, geez, get your mind out of the gutter"
" How do you know all this information?"
" I think I'm going to go leave now"
I started walking away from everyone else when I tripped on my shoelace.
" Goddamnit I have tie shoes. I don't know how to tie them"
" Are you okay?"
" Am I bleeding?"
" No"
"Did any teeth get knocked out?"
" Still no"
" Then I'm fine."
" Eh"
Then there were a few screeching sounds.
" You are adorable! Who let you in?" Mina asked
" Nobody"
" Oh"
" But you're still so cute!" Tsu said.
" I'm really not, I just fell in my face so-"
" Aw, shush your cute face" Mina shushed me by holding her finger up to my face.
Then I got snatched into a hallway.
" Aw!" All the girls were admiring me for some crazy reason.
The girls that snatched me were standing around me, watching me.
" Can you smile or are you depressed like our homeroom teacher?" Mina asked
" I can smile, but I don't like to. It hurts my lips" I admitted.
" Because they are so chapped! Come on, let us give you a makeover!" Hagagure said.
" You know, I'd rather not. But if anyone has a shirt I can borrow, that's fine"
" Mineta bothering you?" Tsu asked.
" Yeah, I don't really mind though because I'm a lesbian"
" You're lesbian?" Mina asked.
" Probably should have kept my mouth shut"
" No, that's amazing!" Uraraka said.
I borrowed a shirt from Mina. It had the words Girl Boss on it. Typical pink alien.
When I left the hallway where the girls were practically sacrificing me to the beauty demon, there was something stuck on the floor.
There was a whole ass coin stuck in the floor. Not on the floor, in the floor.
I got stopped by Aizawa on my way out of the sacrificial hallway.
" I'm not a villain, don't worry"
" That's not what I was going to ask about, but that's good to know. Tomorrow, being something to do during class tomorrow"
" Class?"
" Yeah, Nezu just loves to torture me. Bring a book or your phone with you and follow someone to 1-A"
" What if, I don't know, I wanted to follow along?"
" Well usually that's an issue, but if you insist, I will get you in on a mission tomorrow"
" Hell yeah!"
" So where do you live?"
" America"
" What?"
" Yeah, I forgot to tell you that I'm from another universe"
" Okay, that sucks"
" I know. Sad"
" How did you know everything about me?"
" Well, usually I can just tell by looking at someone, but you my friend, you stuck out in a hefty crowd"
" But how did you know about the antidepressants?"
" Oh, I guessed that part, and I also guessed where you keep it"
" And you do this, how?"
" My mom watches a lot of medical dramas. My personal favorite is House MD"
" I don't think that exists here"
" Probably not"
I was sitting on the ground now, Aizawa was still towering over me.
" Wanna guess anything else about me before I go home?"
" You take Monoamine oxidase inhibitors"
" That is some crazy shit you've got"
" It's actually not that hard. Because Zoloft is the most common antidepressant, I figured you wouldn't have it. And because monoamine oxidase inhibitors is pretty much the only antidepressant you can overdose on, you would definitely have it"
" Alright, I'll feed you and you can sleep on my couch"
" Ooh yay" I started dancing.
" Why are you so excited?"
" Because I'm hungry and I need to get away from those Bitch-ass loud girls" I stopped dancing and replied.
" I tell myself that every day"
" Why do you want to feed me and let me sleep on your couch?" I asked. It's not like Aizawa would just take a random kid into his house and feed it.
" Because you are obviously somewhat smart. I think that Nezu would love to have some more drama in his life too. I personally don't like the idea of Drama, but whatever the principal has to do to not go ballistic on us"
" Damn, that's rough"
" You have no idea"
" So what are you feeding my wrath?"
" Spaghetti?"
" Oh hell yeah!" I yelled.
I started running in circles.
I paused.
" But why are you actually taking me in?" I wondered out loud. " You don't seem like the type of person to just take a kid in and feed it"
" Nezu would freak out if a kid that mysteriously appeared on school grounds were to just disappear"
" Disappear?"
" Security would have taken you and put you in a jail cell. Called your parents too"
" I-" I looked down. " I don't know where my parents are"
" What do you mean? Didn't you teleport yourself here?"
" I don't know. I just know that I am not in the right dimension"
" Dimension?"
" Yeah, I was just in a world where quirks were non-existent. I had no quirk, and I was sitting on my bed, watching my hero academia. Then a portal appeared and now I'm here"
" My hero academia?"
" It's a show that's like this"
" They have superpowers?"
" Quirks, yeah"
" Are you saying that you're in the TV show that we're in?"
" Possibly. I also came from America"
" Where in America?"
" Illinois. If that even exists here"
" It doesn't"
" I figured"
" How come you're here?"
" I don't know"
I was starting to tear up. Does this mean I'll never see my cousins again?
" Are you okay?"
" Fun fact, I'm never okay. It's stupid you would even ask that"
" Let's go, Aria"
" Finally, someone that pronounced it right"
I grabbed my phone off of the floor.
Wait, when did my phone get here?

1483 words :)