The Sneaky Link

Teenage Years

At 16 I dipped out from mamas again and headed straight to my grandma's crib, ready to let loose. I still managed to handle my schoolwork, but I was always skipping class. Instead, I kicked it with my girls Raven and Tyeisha. We'd blaze up that good weed behind the school and cruise around in Raven's whip all damn night, rolling deep with some boys from the football team.

But then, I caught feelings for this hood dude named Cayne. He was older than me, 'cause I never spotted him at our high school. Cayne was straight-up fine, with two cars to his name. He stayed rocking the freshest gear and had mad respect in the neighborhood. I remember the first time we crossed paths, I was posted up on Raven's stoop, vibing to some tunes and puffing on that good stuff.

A tall, light-skinned dude with fresh braids strolled up to Raven, passing her a fat bag of that loud. He was rocking a dope color-blocked tee, some fly jeans, and clean white Nikes.

"I'm Cayne...damn, I ain't never seen you 'round these parts before. What's your name?" he asked, flashing a charming smile.

"Jada," I replied, grinning as I shook his hand.

"Cayne, you know you got two baby mamas tryna slide up on my girl," Tyeisha chimed in, playfully teasing.

We all busted out laughing, and I just shook my head, caught up in the good vibes.

"Here's my digits, hit me up sometime," I said, scribbling my number on his hand. A few hours later, I bounced back home and lent a hand to my grandma in the kitchen, helping her whip up some dinner. Once everything was settled, I made my way to my room. With some smooth tunes playing in the background, I kicked back and started painting my toenails, feeling all relaxed and cozy.

I mustered up the courage and dialed Cayne's number. When he picked up, my heart damn near skipped a beat. His voice was smooth as silk, and I could hear music bumping and folks chatting in the background.

"Wassup lil mama. how was your day?"

"It was good . how was your day?"I asked him smiling from ear to ear.

"Same ole same ole. there is this drive in movie .. you wana go with me . I'll come pick you up?"

"Yeah when?"I said looking out the window to make sure my grandmothers car left. She usually went out of town to her friends house for two nights every other weekend.

"Tonight...thats if your parents ain't on bullshit."

"I live with my grandmama ...she just went out of town."I said.

"Even better..imma pick you up at 9."He said.

"Okay. see you then." As i got dressed in the mirror admiring my cocoa brown skin and long curly black hair i kept remembering what my mother said...I shook my head because at 16 i wanted to know what real love was truly. I didn't want the kind of relationship my mother and father taught me to believe was acceptable. I got dressed and waited for Cayne. At 9 pm he pulled up in a black cadillac blasting Nas and smiling . I walked out and got in the car. His car smelled like black ice and was freshly cleaned and painted. Cayne handed me a soda and we drove off. I looked in the backseat there was blankets and snacks.

"How old are you? "I asked him.

"Why? You the law?"

"No..."I laughed.

"I'm 22."Cayne smiled.

"Ohhh ."

"Listen...we don't gotta do nothing you don't want to do." He smiled rubbing my cheek. We drove to the drive-in movie theater and got settled in the back seat. Cayne kicked off his shoes and propped them up on the chair. i laid back in the seat and took off my clothes. Cayne began kissing me all over my body . I was nervous but it was something about Cayne that made me want to give myself to him. I closed my eyes as he pushed inside of me. The pain was unbearable at first but then i started to like it. Blood seeped down my leg,confirmation that my innocence was no longer there. I began kissing on Cayne and holding him tight as he stroked in an out of me. When we both came i laid in his arms and watched the rest of the movie. From that night on everyone knew that i was Cayne's girl. Everything was so romantic and healthy at first then i started to see the true Cayne. Cayne was very possessive and didn't like me talking to any boys. I was sitting on the bleachers watching a highschool football game with my friend Raven when the linebacker Nate walked up to me. Nate was fine as hell and not only could he play football and basketball well, he could dance.

"Wassup Jada."He smiled resting his foot against the bleacher seat beside me.

"Hey Nate..good game you been practicing i see."I smiled.

"Fasho.so im having this party friday...do you and Raven wanna come?"

"I don't know...."I said thinking of how mad Cayne would be. A couple of minutes later i heard Cayne's caddy pull up and his music blasting.

"I gotta go girl..bye nate."I said hurrying away to the car. Cayne was smoking a blunt and was pissed off..

When i got in the car he sped off i could tell he was angry . I looked out the window hoping that the anger would subside. He pulled over near a abandoned warehouse and turned the car off.

"Who the fuck was that?"

"Who? What are you talking about Cayne?"

"That nigga talking to you at the high school?"

"Cayne. He's a friend that's all. Calm down."

Cayne smacked me across the face. I fell against the window and held my face. I looked over at him and he was breathing fast and his face was scrunched up. I was scared and i wanted to fight back but he was stronger than me, older than me....

"Oh shit! baby I'm sorry. "Cayne said kissing me. I slowly pushed him away.

"Take me home...just take me home."I cried. Cayne took a deep breath and had a look of worry on his face. He drove me home.

"Jada. Please baby i didn't mean it! "He said as I got out of the car and walked into my grandmother's house. I walked past my grandmother who was sitting in the living room with her friends and went upstairs to my room. I undressed and put my night clothes on. Looking at pictures of my siblings i wondered how they were doing . I haven't talked to them or my mother in two years. I was angry at her and hated what she put me and my siblings through. My phone kept ringing . I wasn't trying to answer it.

"Jada ! answer that phone !"My grandmother yelled up the steps.

I sighed and answered it i knew it was Cayne and i didn't care to speak to him.

"What Cayne?"

"Baby. i'm sorry . i will never do it again . I just can't stand the thought of someone taking you from me."

"Cayne nobody could ever take me from you. I love you."I said.

"I love you too girl i promise i will never hurt you again. I promise ."Cayne said

I hoped Cayne wouldn't put his hands on me again and i hoped that my mother was wrong about men. I prayed that Cayne was different.