Finding Jaime

Chapter 72

"You're all packed?" Dad asked, poking his head into my bedroom.

"I think so," I said. "What else do I need?"

"I've got your meds, you packed clothes, books, stuff to keep you entertained?" He asked. I nodded.

"Well, beyond that, whatever else we can probably grab on the road if needed," Dad said.

I nodded and double checked I had all the chargers to all the stuff I was bringing.

I'd spent a week in the hospital after waking up. The oncologist had come to visit and said with my blood work looking as it did - and they kept checking it as I recovered - he was dropping my chemo to once a week starting immediately and as crappy as I felt for a couple of days after the chemo, the rest of the week I almost felt normal.

I could hang out with my brothers and play with my little sister more than I could before. I still got tired easily and I still wound up taking naps from time to time, but I had more energy for a few days before my chemo and it didn't feel like it took as long to recover after.

"Don't forget we're seeing Dr. Jansen tomorrow and we leave on Wednesday," Dad said as I zipped up my duffel bags.

"I know, I know," I grinned at him.

Meagan came into my room just then with a pile of laundry.

"You didn't have to do my laundry, Meagan," I said. "I can do it."

"Jaime, it's not like we're using washboards or river rocks. Throwing your clothes into a machine for it to do all the work, really isn't a big deal," she smiled at me. Her face kind of fell when she saw my duffel bags.

"Last time you used those, you were so... angry. And lost. I worried about you. I worried about your brothers and especially your sister. I didn't know what to expect from a 15-year-old who'd just lost his mother and just been told who his father is," she sighed. "You were so, so angry."

I looked down. I remembered how I felt. I remember being so mad. Mad at my mom and mad at my dad at the same time. But then I met Marvel, and at 2, I couldn't be mad at her. She was cute. And then I met Bronx and Saint and got to know them, once I stopped being so mad at everyone.

There was the incident in the canyon that made me see how much Dad was really willing to take on this bundle of anger that was me. Although, by then, I wasn't so angry anymore.

"You've come a long way in a pretty short time, Jaime," she said to me, and hugged me. "I'm so glad we finally got to know about you, and got to know you. I wish we'd known about you all along, though."

"Me too," I said. I wouldn't elaborate. Dad knew how I felt about Mom. I'm sure he's told Meagan some of it. I hadn't told anyone about the the 'room' and my mom while I was in a coma and I intended to keep it that way.

"Jaime! You read me a story?" Marvel asked, coming running into my room, freshly bathed and in pyjamas.

"You bet I will!" I smiled at her. "I just have to put a couple of things away and I'll be right there."

She grinned and skipped out of my room.

"That kid loves you," Meagan smiled as Marvel left the room. "We were so dreading having to tell her if... things hadn't gone well at the hospital."

"I kinda love that kid, too," I said. "I'm glad that at least for now, I still get to see her grow up."

"For now?" Meagan asked.

"Nothing's a given. No one knows what's going to happen. I'm not giving up obviously, but nothing is certain really."

Meagan smiled at me.

"You are one intelligent and wise young man, Jaime. The boys and Marvel are so lucky to have you as their older brother."

I smiled.

I finished putting my stuff away and went into Marvel's room where she was playing with her dolls while she waited for her story. I scooped her up and started tickling her.  She shrieked with laughter.

"No, Jaime! No tickle!!" She laughed. It was music to my ears.

"But, but, you're so deliciously ticklish!" I said, tickling her some more as I dropped with her on her bed. She giggled as she rolled off of me and crawled up to the top of her bed and put her head on her pillow. She held out a book for me to read. It was called "What About Me?" 

"Uncle Joe gived it to me a cause you got cancer and it maked you sick. So Uncle Joe said this would help me know why Mama and Daddy might be busy with you, but they still love me!"

"They do. They always will. Even if you grow up to be a pterodactyl, they'll still love you."

"Silly Jaime! Peoples can't be dinosaurs!"

"Are you sure?" I asked.

"Yes!" She giggled.

I lay down beside her and started reading the book to her. She had her stuffy and was curled up next to me listening and looking at the pictures.

"Jaime?" She asked as I got to the end of the book.

"Yeah, Mar?" I asked.

"I'm glad fun Jaime is back," she said, wrapping her tiny arms around me. I pulled her into a hug.

"I'm glad, too. Even though I still have some not so fun days."

"Is you cancer gone?" She asked.

"I hope so. Just a few more yucky weeks and hopefully soon? I don't have to take the medicine that I get at the hospital," I explained.

"Chemo," she said.

"Yeah," I said, and kissed her on the head. She smelled like strawberries.

"Did Mama use the strawberry shampoo on your hair?" I asked her.

"Uh huh," Marvel said, her eyes starting to droop closed.

"You smell delicious," I said, as I rubbed her back while she fell asleep.

"I no for eating, Jaime," she mumbled.

"I know. I love you Marvel. See you in the morning."

"Love you too, Jaime," she mumbled as she fell asleep. I got up, closed her door part way, made sure her nightlight was on and went back to my room to finish packing the last of my clothes.

"Lakers are playing tonight," Bronx said, leaning on my doorframe. "Wanna come watch with Dad and me?"

"Yeah," I smiled at my brother. "I'll be down in, five minutes?"

"Cool. Want popcorn?"

"Sure," I smiled.

I went into my bathroom and looked at myself in the mirror. How weird that a few months ago, I stood here and tried to end my own life. And the things that had happened since, but had tested my relationship with my family.

My family. I have a family. I have my dad. My siblings. And a step mom, who was more like a mom. Meagan was - is - awesome. I wonder how she'd feel if I called her Mom. I decided I'd test it out.