AFFLICTION- LRH

Oh, Memories? Where'd you go?

Lukes POV:

March 15th, 2012.

"I am not going to do it!" I shout behind me, slamming the door shut.

I refuse too.

Who do they think I am?

"Luke.." I hear Arabella quietly, trying her best to sound comforting from behind the closed door, "You have to do it. If you don't, you will be the one dead."

"I am not going to kill anybody, Bella." I cry out, throwing myself onto the bed, the brims of my eyes beginning to water as I try my best to hide the muffled sobs.

It doesn't take long before I hear the door hinges begin to creak, the sound of soft footsteps entering the room, giving me more then any indication that my sister had entered.

I don't know who she thinks I am.

This was not something for me to do.

After what happened to us.. you would think she understood.

"Lu, I need you to listen to me," She coos, taking a seat at the foot of the bed where my body slumped over, her hands rustling through my hair as she softly hushed me, "look at me."

Rubbing my eyes harshly, I look up to her, "Why are they making me do this?"

"You cannot show them any sign of weakness, Luke. You know this." She sighs, using her finger to swipe under my cheeks at the fly away tears.

"I am just a kid," I choke, "I am supposed to be out there playing football with Ash, not going on a job and killing someone."

"You don't think I know that?" She huffs, "Luke, the last thing your older sister wants is for you to be put on this type of mission. But it is an honor. The man himself asked for you specifically."

The man. He was the leader.

No one knew yet who he was, but we all knew one thing.

If the man says it, you do it.

No turning back.

"But I don't even like guns!" I sob once more, throwing my head down into the soft cushioned mattress. I feel the heat of her hand pressed against my back, rubbing it gently to try to get me to shut up.

The last thing any man does in this community is cry.

But dammit, I was terrified.

"Listen," Arabella says, cracking each of her knuckles against my skin, a nervous tick she had, "I know this is not the type of life we were meant to have, but this is how it is. And if you don't do this, they will kill you too. I refuse to let that happen. I cannot have that."

"Why can't someone else do it? Someone older, why me?"

"Because," she softly smiles, "they see potential in you, Lu. They are going to one day turn you into something you are not, but that is all they can do to you. You are going to listen to everything they tell you to do, and you are going to do it better than anyone in this gang, you got that? You will get over your fear of weapons, you will use that gun, but you are not going to let them take your heart and mind, do you understand me?"

"But Bella-"

"As long as I live," She reaches for my cheeks, a firm but gentle grip holding me between her thumb and forefinger, "i will not let them turn you into the monsters that they are."