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"looking at yourself. Alot goes in your mind "I don't know if I am ready to show myself" You worry day and night"

 Alot goes in your mind "I don't know if I am ready to show myself" You worry day and night"

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6 years later:

"are you really gonna sleep early today too?" big brother was standing at the door of my room.

'yeah. I do everyday. why?' I said while I went through my skincare routine.

"cause today is not everyday Naya-chan. its your 15th birthday." he said with a sigh.

today 7 years have passed since that day. we lived with grandpa and grandma.never heard a word from dad,The only thing that came to us from him was his monthly cheque, don't know anything expect how his buisness is in its best right now and how successful he is. He sends us money so we can survive that's it well what can I ask for more?

I don't care about him anymore and if he one days totally cut his ties from us and stop sending money. me and big brother has a lot of it saved in our account. enough till I find a job and hiro-chan and grandpa are here anyways so why should I care?I mean it's not my fault. Care should come from both sides but he just left us without any contact then why should I care about him?

We were homeschooled cause there weren't any nice elementary and middle schools near schools here. Thats why we are still in our 1st year while all the people of my and big brothers age has started there 2nd year in middle school and high school. just like Hiro-chan promised he did find me a new sensei.He was an international coach of martial arts. I got a blackbelt in Taekwondo 2 months ago and won 30 meddles. 20 gold. 6 silver and 4 bronze. why do I remember all the numbers? cause I am proud of them and I will remember each detail even if there are more then 1000 meddles, that will happen soon.

in the mean time I also learned judo and jiu jitsu. I am a blue belt in judo and brown belt in jiu jitsu. I am not planning on continuing them tho. I have learnt how to kick ass with whatever I know so. maybe in future. Big brother himself won countless of boxing tournaments, people even gave him a a nick name 'shinro. The fist beast' cool isnt it. After my 8th birthday I never celebrated any of my birthdays, and I don't know why he expects me to celebrate this one.

'nii-san I haven't celebrated my birthday for 7 years and I dont remember staying up late on any of them. this one isnt any different. A simple dinner in a restaurant would do. I don't wanna mess up my routine.' I said and layed on my bed

he chuckled and said "I don't know why I thought I had a chance this time. well nothing can change your mind right?"

'you know me well. you tell me' I said with a light laugh

"well goodnight naya-chan"

'goodnight nii-san. thank you for caring tho.'

he smiled and closed the door.
Well Hiro-chan will come tomorrow. I am looking forward to that. I looked at the side table beside my bed, the hairclip mom and dad got me at my 8th birthday. I smiled at it, 'happy 15th birthday Nayaka.'

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