A young woman who was suicidal since a long time finally once attempted it but saved by the CEO of Chase Industries ltd. Though little did he know, he was walking into the unchartered territory of hallucinations and other past traumas.
Would their...
I realized I always remained too much in my head, and that's why I ended up losing my mind. No matter what I do now, I can't gain back my sanity. It's as if everything went down the gutter the day I decided to run away from London and found my abode in New York. But who was I kidding?! Wherever I go, whatever I do, they'll always follow me to the hell and back. With my mind searching different scenarios frantically in the safe I locked and threw away long ago, one was the most prominent: The voice. The voice telling me, "You're worth nothing. A burden to your parents and an inconvenience to your friends. Jump from the first building you can get your sight on. The world would be a better place without you in it." So that's what I did.
I was standing in front of quite a modern building with a dark aesthetic but some very classy vibes. It was beautiful. Such a sad thing that it would now be associated with a tragic story. Suddenly, I was greeted by a woman with concern evident in her eyes, with her eyebrows creasing in the middle of her forehead. She gasped and said, "Oh my god! You are covered in blood all over. My dear, you need to be taken to the hospital immediately." She reached out to grab my hand, but I pulled out of her reach immediately. She seemed to be a sweet woman coz she said, "Hey, I won't hurt you. I just wanna help you. Please stop crying and let me take you to the hospital." At that moment, I realized I had been crying. I was so numb to everything around me that I didn't even realize tears had been streaming down my face all along. With my face stained with dried tears and my white shirt stained with blood all over it, I probably looked like a zombie to the other pedestrians. I looked blankly in her eyes and told her, "It's not my blood, don't worry." Now she looks terrified. For fuck's sake, let me go. I didn't murder somebody. I should have but I didn't. She just scurried back away into the building to avoid any more association with me.
I sighed and walked ahead. I couldn't let my thoughts scatter anymore and ruin everything again. I quickly made my way to the staircase, skipping on them two at a time and opened the door of the rooftop with a bang. I was frustrated and broken beyond belief. I couldn't afford to mourn for myself any longer. It was enough. I had enough. There were some glass wine bottles lying around here and there. I picked them up and started smashing them one by one against the floor hard, while full blown sobbing now. I wailed, screeched and cried in pain so hard looking at the sky that my throat hurts now. Then I was quiet. An eerie silence. So much to say but no words came out. With all my thoughts left unspoken and my story untold, I walked over to the edge of the ledge and just sat down there with my legs dangling in the air. My hands were gipping the ledge so hard that my knuckles turned white. I was in deep thought, looking at the infinite sky above me as if waiting for the stars to nod at me and tell me, "It's okay Allysa. You have been through enough. It's time for you to say goodbye now and come seek your home in us. We are still here." That's when all the stiffness and rigidity left my body, and I began to let my tears flow freely again but silently. This time I could feel them. This time I wasn't mourning for myself but rather crying in relief. It's over. I am gonna be free. No one can hurt me ever again. For the first time, I felt at peace. The wind started blowing through my hairs, caressing my skin letting me know it is indeed alright. I closed my eyes and felt what does it feel like being alive for one last time and a small smile crept up on my face. I chose my last words: "Life is a beautiful lie and death a painful truth. And I'd rather choose my truth coz pain is what all I know. Goodbye."
With those last words from my mouth, I stood up, faced my back against the world, raised my middle finger, and fell downwards looking at the endless sky calling my name. I smiled towards my end, felt the pressure of the wind and closed my eyes, feeling sane in the world of insane, falling and falling...
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I woke up in a field of daffodils. The clear sky greeting me with warmth. Sun shone against my skin, reflecting against it. I felt healthy like I had never been weak to begin with. I was wearing a pretty white dress with no blood stains and a tiara of flowers on my head. I was happy. I was content. I skipped around the field inhaling the scent of the daffodils and they smelled like freedom and joy. My heart was dancing with pleasure and I with pride. Death was the best decision of my life. And never in a million years would I ever think to undo it....
