The Beatles Imagines ❤️

| Paul |

The same angst with this guy idk how to change it-sorry for all the angst it just provides me comfort ig

Carissa turned the news on and her heart stopped as she read the Headline:

John Lennon, shot and killed at age 40

"Paul, Paul Paul Paul!" She yelled frantically, getting very panicky, her throat tightening.
Carissa had known John since they were 8, multiple years longer than Paul (7) but this would obviously be very, very hard on him, maybe even more. He loved John with all his being, even if they didn't see eye to eye. Same with Carissa; she loved him dearly.
"What's wrong, darling?" Paul asked her, rushing up to her with concern. Carissa cupped her mouth with her hand as tears streamed down her face and shakily pointed to the tv, letting out a sob and sinking to the ground.
"No. No no no no!" Paul said, becoming panicked as well as he went up to the tv.
He went back to you and knelt to the ground, gripping you tightly, allowing her to nestle her head into his chest, him burying his head in the crook of her neck.
"He's-he's gone. And that bitch Yoko didn't even call us." Carissa cried.
"I know, I know." Paul said high-pitched and fast.
"It'll be ok." He whispered, though he knew it wouldn't be ok. He just lost his best friend.

Two days after John's death,  Carissa was sitting on the couch, trying to focus on her book, but she just couldn't. the thought of John haunted her. Everything was fine when she woke up, until she decided she would phone John. Then she remembered, and she would break down in tears.
Paul walked into the room, seeming fine. How could he be so calm about this? Hadn't he known John for 23 years? Carissa wondered.
"Paul, love?" Carissa asked him, standing up and walking towards him.
"Yes, Riss?" Paul looked at her wearily.
"I know that men don't typically cry that much, but you know it's ok to cry. It's normal. And I know this is a very offensive question, but are you even that sad? I mean, you guys did have a falling out, but you guys were best friends..no. That was a stupid question. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I'm being stupid." Carissa looked down, avoiding Paul's blank stare.
"You think that's how I feel?" Paul asked quietly.
Carissa stayed silent. Paul lifted her chin with his finger.
"I loved John. I loved him with everything I had. Do you really think I'm that much of a monster? Of a cold-hearted person? The grief I feel could crush an elephant, Carissa. I just-I just don't deal with emotion well. I didn't cry when my mom died-not much, anyways. I just don't cope healthily. So, I'm sorry I don't cry, ok?" Paul said steadily and sternly, but also sadly and regretfully.
"Ok. I'm sorry I asked that. It was stupid." Carissa answered quietly.
"No, you were right. God, why can't I cry? I fucking love him. I love-d him. He was my best friend. I'm never going to see him again. Wow." He made a noise that sounded like a laugh, like he was trying to laugh in denial. "I'm never going to see him again, am I? Christ." He put his hands on his hips and shook his head, licking his lip slightly as tears formed in his eyes.
He looked at Carissa, who was starting to cry as well.
"I'm never going to see him again." He said softly, his voice cracking.
"No." Carissa shook her head, tears flooding down her face as she attempted to hastily wipe them.
"No more laughs. No more memories. I need to hear his voice. I need to." Paul said frantically, rushing to his record player. He put on the "Imagine" album. He bought it even though it had a song that shaded him.

Imagine there's no heaven
It's easy if you try
No hell below us
Above us only sky

Carissa sobbed silently as Paul listened to the song, getting more worked up. As tears poured down his face, Carissa cautiously went up to him and hugged him, wrapping her arms around the back of his neck as he gripped her tightly.
"You're ok. He's in a better place now." She stroked his hair, trying to convince herself the same thing while she also tried to gain her composure and rid her wobbly tone.
"He's gone." Paul cried. "I miss him so much. I wish I did something. I wish we were close like we used to be before he died." Paul said, the dreadful regret burning in his stomach.
Carissa pulled away and looked at him. "You can't change the past, love. He adored you, even the second before he passed. Don't regret anything. You don't deserve the weight and burden of the guilt. Ok?" Carissa smiled sympathetically at him, wiping his tears with her thumbs.
He stared into her blue eyes and nodded. He knew he had to be strong. He loved John, and he would definitely miss him, but he had to celebrate his life and remember the memories.
"Ok." Paul smiled to his best ability.
The pair sat on the couch, listening to the record player, laying down, Paul's hand over her waist and her hands on Paul's chest.
Paul and Carissa lip synced to "Oh my love" and tears slid down their faces as they did so.
"I mean, we can still cry, right?" She smiled at him.
"Yes." He wiped her tears, and she did the same to him.
"I love you. We're going to be ok." He told her.
She nodded. "I love you too." She kissed him softly.