02. Only the Start

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"Karma's a relaxing thought

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"Karma's a relaxing thought. Aren't you envious that for you it's not?"- Taylor Swift


Ever since I got back home I've been trying to keep myself busy. I've studied for 5 hours straight after I got home. Well at least after I finished crying. Even though there wasn't much to study since it was only the first day of school, I just kept studying my notes over and over again. I have to get it in my head just in case any of these shitty teachers try to pull the pop quiz card on me. 

After I finished studying I ate a granola bar from by backpack since I haven't eaten anything yet today. I didn't want to go downstairs to eat something, scared that my mother might say something. 

Anyways, after all that I've been staring at the ceiling trying to sleep. It's been almost two hours. Just looking at the same grey chipped paint of my ceiling. Every night. Every day. I start to realize that i'm not going to sleep tonight. 

5 minutes after

Staring at my ceiling started to get boring after another couple of minutes. "Ugh." I whisper and get off my bed and on my feet. I look at myself in the mirror next to my door before heading out. My eyes are slightly puffy and red which will most likely be worse in the morning. My eyes have dark bags under them due to lack of sleep. This time my eyes are a little red. I've only had 4 hours of sleep collectively for the last 2 days. And two of them were spent on Greyson shoulder-

SHUT UP.

Taking off Greyson's hoodie, I fold it neatly, laying it on my bed. His hoodie is way too comfy to give back. Which I doubt I'll do, unless he asks for it. 

I start to strip off my jeans and replace them with a pair of black Nike shorts. Reaching out of my drawer I take out a Taylor Swift Eras Tour hoodie and pull it over myself. I take a quick glance upwards at the clock above my door to check the time. 

12:53

"To other people this would be late to go out, but to me it's definitely the perfect time." I smile at my own thoughts.

I go downstairs as quietly as I possible can and take my keys with me. I make sure to grab my basketball along on the way out. Opening my door, I lock it before tip-toeing my way out and pull my hood up shortly after. It took me a couple of minutes to get to the court that was only a few streets away. It's so dark at night that the only thing that lights it up is are the street lights. I'm basically asking myself to get kidnapped.

I gently place my phone and keys next to the base of the basketball hoop.

I place my right AirPod in my ear at full volume and start working on my shots as Change by Taylor Swift starts playing.

"Well it's a sad picture, the final blow hits you."

"Somebody else gets what you wanted again."

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