Are we forbidden?

twenty four

10.07.23

It had now been around 25 minutes without any call from anyone. I was scared and alone with no way of getting back to the girls and the panic set in.  I could call a car service but I would have to pay, it isn't like I'm not insured but it would be so much more hassle.

The road was still busy and cars were passing every second. Until one pulled up right behind me.

I quickly locked the doors, part of me hoping it was someone who could help me, the other part hoping someone just needed to check their phone before they kept going. That was until I recognised the car, it was Leah.

She got out and began walking over to me, panic set in as I unlocked the door and stepped out. 

"How did you find me?" There was no way she could of found me by just driving around.

"You unblocked me so I had your location back on Find my iPhone," Leah replied "Why did you hang up?"

"You were busy and I was only calling for you to tell Lauren to check her phone" How could I say that what she said to Jordan scared me or confused me. 

"Is there a spare tyre?" I shrugged my shoulders, the only thing I knew about cars was how to drive them.

Leah got the spare tyre out out the boot of the car and began fixing it, I was slightly shocked she knew how to do this but I didn't want to spark any unnecessary conversation.

That was the plan anyway, but all of the thoughts that were circulating in my head got the better of me.

"You said you love me" I blurted, this was one of those moment in films where they would cover their mouths in embarrassment.

Leah looked up at me and all she said was "I did"

What the fuck does that even mean? i had already started why not continue with this little burst of confidence.

"No, you said you love me. Not loved, not have loved, love." That sentence made so much sense in my head yet i could not for the life of me figure out if it made sense out loud.

"Yes I did" Was again, all Leah said.

"Leah if you do not say more words than 'I did' I will steal your car and leave you to fix this one" My confidence really decided to make an appearance in this conversation.

"I do love you Robin, so yes I did say that" A small giggle was let out before she began that sentence.

"Why are you giggling this is not a giggling matter, do not giggle" If my hands weren't shaking before they certainly were now.

Leah just looked down at me, thats all she did. She just stared I dont know if she was waiting for me to say more or if she was going to say something, I honestly dont know. 

"What?" I asked.

"I haven't heard your voice properly in a few days, its nice is all" Leah smiled before continuing with fixing the car.

"You are the one to blame for that, not me" I missed her.

It hurt to admit that but I missed her and she was right there. I hadn't talked, hugged or kissed her in days and she was right there in front of me. 

After I said that, she put her head down and the small smile on her face disappeared.

"I know, I'm sorry Ro" I saw a tear escape her eye. It was small and if you blinked you'd have missed it, but I didn't.

"Why?" My words were shaky, she was cruel to me yet she loves me?

"It's complicated" That was not a good enough answer.

"No, what will be complicated is if I was to take your car and your tools and leave you here alone like I was and like how you made me feel. Alone" Leah's looked up to me once more, she stood up and started walking towards me. 

Engulfing me in a hug so tightly she could of killed me was the last thing I expected. Leah stroked my back, and nestled her face into my hair. 

"What are you doing?" I asked, muffled by Leah's shoulder.

"Remembering how it feels to hug you" 

That broke me, I sobbed. Right into Leah's shoulder, I sobbed. 

"Tell me why" Was all I could get out, I deserved an explanation.

"Not here, meet me at our spot at The Lensbury" She said as she let me go, picking up the tools and putting the punctured tyre in the boot.

I battled in my head on whether I should go or whether I should not, I thought of the benefits and the negatives before I asked my next question.

"What time?" A small smile reappeared on Leah's face.

"When Lauren is asleep so like 10 maybe?" Leah replied and questioned at the same time before unlocking her car.

"Okay, thank you Le. You saved me tonight" Leah slightly nodded her head.

"Always darling" She said before getting in her car as did I. 

I was so ready to be off of this road which got quieter as time passed. I finally began the journey back to the hotel almost 2 hours later. 

After around 25 minutes I made it back, Leah pulling in at the same time as me. 

I headed straight for the pool, ready to berate Lauren for not answering her phone. Low and behold they were all exactly where I expected them to be.

"Robin, there you are we missed you" Lucy shouted, making everyone turn their heads to look at me.

"Do none of you answer your phones?" Everyone began reaching for their phone on the loungers and saw all of the missed calls from me.

"Jesus Robin what happened" Lauren asked.

"Your car had a punctured tyre I got stuck, I was calling you all for like 45 minutes" They all looked guilty and all said sorry.

Only one person didn't rush to their phone or even pay any attention and that was Jordan who had been in the corner with Millie. 

My confidence had apparently not gone away and I did something I never thought I would do. 

"Oh and Jordan, I am not a 'her' my name is Robin and if you are going to refer to me at least have the decency to use my name, thanks" Every single one of them turned to Jordan, then back to me in shock. All of them with a smirk on their face.

"Lauren, your car needs a new spare tyre and the punctured one is in your boot it is all fixed" Lauren thanked me and asked if I was okay before I left the pool room. 

I headed up to my room and had a much needed shower, before watching some netflix waiting for the time I arranged to meet Leah.