Lisette

Chapter 34 ~ To Love a Single Person So Much

We were barely in through the door when Enjolras took me in his arms and kissed me again. Where before he had been tender - almost hesitant - this time he was more confident, more openly passionate.

"I still can't quite believe this," I murmured, as he pulled away from me slightly. 

"Nor can I. But I love you, Lisette. More than I can put into words."

The moon, almost full, was shining in through the window, and the only light to see by. As I turned away to put down my bonnet and light the end of a candle - I'd need to buy some more for this week - he caught me by the waist and pulled me back towards him.

"I love you too, my dear. But I can't go to sleep in this dress," I smiled, looking up at him in the light of the small flame. 

"Well, I'm sure I can help you a little with that," he whispered, his breath tickling my ear. 

As he finished undoing the hooks at the back of my dress, I did what I had longed to do that morning - or yesterday morning, I suppose it must have been, given that it was long past midnight now - and lent back against him, pulling his arms around me. He moved away, though, and I felt some confusion before I felt him slip his hands inside the bodice of the dress, bringing me closer. I felt him dip his head, and nuzzle into my neck, pressing kisses from just below my ear all the way down to my shoulder. As the dress slipped down, I undid the petticoats, and slid all of them off in one. I turned to face him, looking up at him in the dim, golden light of the candle.

"It's strange," he said, looking down at me as I began to undo the buttons of his waistcoat. "I knew - I know - that in the world I want to create, love would be the most important thing. No more darkness, no more death, no retaliation, or ignorance. But I never thought - never imagined - to love a single person so much..."

He trailed off, and I could feel myself flushing, struggling to meet his gaze.

"I've always thought about things in terms of the bigger picture," he continued. "Thinking about the poor as a whole - considering them all to be a faceless mass. One worthy of sympathy and help, certainly, but I don't think I'd ever seen them as individuals. But what you've done - what you continue to do -"

"I don't feel as though I've done anything. I've just been here inconveniencing you!"

"Not an inconvenience. Never an inconvenience. And having you by my side - being able to build a better world for people -"

"No, we can't build a better world for people," I said, loosening his cravat. "We have to help them build it for themselves. Speak up for people, and help them in the things they can't yet do, but they have to help build the world they find themselves in. They have to have a part in the creation of it. Elsewise, it's just a cage."

I sat down on the bed and began unpinning my hair as he finished undressing. In the warm light, he turned to look at me, half smiling.

"And this brings us back to our usual discussions on education and democracy."

"Quite. As pillow-talk goes, I'm not sure they're the most conventional topics."

"Well, from what I can tell, neither of us are exactly conventional."

He looked away for a moment, and then came and sat down next to me, taking my hand.

"Truth be told, I've no idea what I'm doing when it comes to any of this. I've never been in love before, let alone kissed a woman -"

"There are plenty of men quite happy to kiss women and more without a shred of love being involved."

"Still..."