recovery || chaesoo

14

dear diary,

earlier today, rosé came over. we went upstairs and we both sat on my bed.

"so, jisoo... you haven't really told me much about yourself. give me a bit of an introduction."

i wondered where to start. my life has of course been pretty... hard lately, and i didn't want to seem like an attention seeker.

"well uh... you do remember my full name, yes?"

"right, kim jisoo. that stuck with me. what about your family?"

"well, i do have an older brother. he's in his early 30s now. his name is seokjin, but he prefers just jin."

"what's he like?"

i smiled.

"he's... wonderful. i love him so much. i couldn't ask for a better brother. he's helped me so much since jennie left me."

"he sounds amazing."

"yeah, he is."

i shook my head and turned back to rosé.

"what about you, rosé? what's your family like?"

rosé's smile faded off her face.

"hey, are you okay? what's wrong? was it something i said?"

"oh no jisoo, it wasn't you. it's just... i have a supportive and kind older brother too... but... my parents aren't really, uh, like him."

"what do you mean?"

"well uh... you see... i'm a lesbian... and i come from a christian family. my parents are homophobic... and so i can't tell them about who i am."

sympathy came over me. that's one of the worst things that can happen. being a lesbian, or gay, or even bisexual like me, and having homophobic parents.

"i'm so sorry rosé, that's horrible."

"don't worry, my brother is very supportive of me and i'm so thankful for him."

"who is he then?"

"my brother?"

i nodded.

"well... his name is jimin. he's a year older than me, and i told him i was a lesbian before my parents. he just hugged me, and told me that we'd figure it out, and how supportive he is of me."

"He sounds like jin..."

"yeah, i bet they'd both be good friends..." she looked up at me, smiled, and held my hand. "... just like we are."

i took her hand too. "you do know i'm so supportive of you too, right rosé?"

"yes of course... thank you chichu."

i looked at her. "chichu?"

she let go of me and turned.

"oh, uh, it's just... a nickname! if you don't like it then um i can just-"

"no." i cut her off. "i love it. it sounds cute!"

"oh!" she smiled. "okay!"

she left not long after that, and i'm still thinking about it. the way she took my hand, and smiled at me...

rosé is so kind, and so caring. i don't want to ever lose her. i do cherish her a lot...

as a friend! as a friend!

... right?

- jisoo