The Marriage Counselor. (Woman x intersex)

one-hundred one.

Okay, here we are. The last chapter.

UNEDITED

chapter one hundred- one: Hospice.

"We can sit here as long as you need." Nour breathed as they both stared out of the windshield. Danielle's heart was beating harshly in her chest. She was nervous, the couple being parked in the lot of the hospice center. She hasn't been here in months, the children going to visit with Adel instead of their mother.

Her anxiety peaked every single time she did go, the same way it did now. The nervousness, the sudden awareness of her appearance and which flaw Daphne would notice first. The preparation for conversations that haven't happened yet in her mind. Making sure the kids were their best selves so she had nothing to complain about.

Danielle suddenly froze as she stared outside of the car window. The realization that she no longer had to worry about those things dawned on her, a sudden broken laugh coming from her mouth causing Nour to jump and look over at her with confusion. Another laugh came out of her mouth, it being short and mixed with a gasp. Then another, this one being a full set of giggles and hollers as she slapped her thigh.

"Whew, Lord Jesus.." Danielle snickered as she wiped the fake sweat from her forehead before looking at her husband. He had his eyebrows pursed as he stared at her in confusion and worry.

"What was that?"

"I'm free. I'm fucking free."

"Yes I know-"

"No, papa. No you don't. You don't know..holy shit I'm free." Danielle laughed again, her tears streaming down her face as she opened the car door, Nour following after her. She ran inside, looking for her father and her children before seeing them in the living area of the clinic. Mason and Elias were on their tablets, Nubia asleep in her stroller as Nasir and Adel spoke softly.

"Hey.."

"Oh Dani.." Adel called as he ran over to his daughter. His embrace warmed Danielle, the older woman hugging her father back as he rubbed her upper shoulders. They held each other for a while, rocking back and forth as Danielle trembled from holding her sobs in because they weren't full of sadness.

Just relief.

"My princess, I'm so sorry..I'm sorry.." Adel whispered. Danielle sniffed, her tears slipping onto his sweater as she continued to tremble. Adel felt it, gripping her tighter as he let out a shaky breath.

"It's okay..I know..let it go..you can be happy that she's gone..I know you're trying not to be-"

"Baba, I'm sorry I'm sorry..I should've been here more.." Danielle finally let go, leaning her weight on her dad as she let it all out. His embrace was something she rarely received but always appreciated. Every-time her mother would make her cry, Adel was always there to catch her and pick up the pieces. But the older she got, the less he was able to intervene which she now understood was out of fear and hurt.

And now she had a husband who was more than happy to do the same. Nour's attention immediately went to the kids, checking on them and talking to them while Danielle continued to embrace her father. It felt good knowing that when she only had forty percent, he'd be able to provide the remaining sixty.

And vice versa.

Danielle finally pulled away from her dad, both of them teary eyed with watery smiles as they cleaned their cheeks from their hot tears. The energy felt different. It didn't feel mourning, but the sadness was there. But so was happiness and relief that the last part of this morbid chapter was over.

They were all free and couldn't wait to use it. Almost two years ago, Danielle and Nour would've never thought they'd be the people they were now. And it kept hitting her as she watched him kiss their children's foreheads and laugh with them to keep them distracted from what was going on.

She's finally living in the reality she prayed for, and the one woman who never let her wear her rose-colored glasses couldn't rip them off of her face any longer. Instead she was surrounded by unconditional love and peace.

Finally.

"You okay?" Nour asked quietly as he touched her waist from behind. She looked up slightly before nodding, looking back down at the tombstone where her mothers birthdate and death date were engraved.

Daphne Denise Sanaa.

The service and burial were quiet except for the sobs that came from both sides of Danielle's family. It's been almost two weeks since she passed. People mourned, but she just embraced the newfound peace she felt as she watched her mothers casket lower down into the six foot hole that was dug specifically for her. The couple didn't move into their new home yet, Danielle spending time with her family, both immediate and relatives who came to visit. She was exhausted, but it was an exhaustion that didn't take over her for once in her life.

She missed her husband. He stayed once or twice, but preferred to give the woman her space as she spent time with her loved ones. She didn't want it at first, but then started to appreciate it once she realized how overwhelming planning a funeral was. So to help her out Nour just listened every night on the phone as she vented and gave her his credit card to pay for all of the expenses.

I just want to help while also being out of your way. That's all.

"Yeah. I'm okay. I'll meet you at the limo." Danielle responded. Nour nodded, leaning in and kissing her cheek. Danielle turned and leaned in, kissing his lips as soft as she could. It was slow and calculated, their lips moving against each other's slowly and intimately.  She watched her husband walk off, his tall and muscular figure in his black suit causing her body to sing for him.

She stared down at the tombstone again before leaning down and kneeling onto the grass right beside it. Her dress was simple, it pooling around her legs which helped shield her brown legs from the cold weather.

"You know..I've prayed about the right things to say for your eulogy, but I just couldn't bring myself to embarrass you the way that I originally planned to. Something in my spirit told me I'm better than that..than the vengeance that's still suppressed I guess..than the humiliation and shame that you've put me through time and time again. I felt guilty for feeling free..for being able to say, 'finally. Your voice won't be in the back of my head' at every given moment because you won't be here. You won't be here to make it real. I can finally tell it to shut the fuck up.

I remember that time...I came to you for help. It was the first time I felt my first marriage going down. He forgot our anniversary that year..and didn't come home. So I called you, mama. I called my mama and what did you tell me? 'Clearly you're not playing your role accordingly. I wouldn't be surprised if he had enough and decided to slap you the way I used to. You be needing it.'  And you know..not even a few years later did he do just that. He hit me..he trashed my things..he tried..to kill me..and I ended up killing him myself. In front of my child and my now husband.

But you wouldn't know that. Because you didn't care, mama. All I ever needed...was you. You. Not daddy, not grandma or grandpa. You. And you never showed up for me. You showed up for my cousins and my aunts and uncles..but me? Never. And I always used to ask why...why why why...but the love of my life, the same person you died knowing as a stranger since you couldn't put your pride aside, taught me that sometimes there's really no other reason except for power. You wanted power over me because you didn't have power over your own life. And I fucking let you have it. Because I loved you. I loved you more than you loved me and now I am free...I'm fucking free to love my kids the way I want to. I'm free to love my HUSBAND the way I want to. Not the way I think is right or wrong because YOU drilled that into my fucking head.

I spiraled because every calculated move I've ever made in my life crumbled in front of me. It's because it wasn't my life to begin with. It's the life YOU wanted that you groomed me into believing I needed to survive. To make you proud. But you were never proud. And now..I'll blow you kisses while you burn in hell."  Danielle spat before standing up and storming off, her heels clicking on the ground of the concrete as she walked off to the limo where the people who truly mattered waited for her.

One more chapter before the epilogue won't hurt..right?