show me yours | matty healy

chapter twenty-eight

May 1st 2015

Matty rubs his tired eyes slowly as he keeps blinking at the screen in front of him, George is passed out on the seat beside him, he'd moved three together to fit his body with his head in Matty's lap. The singer occasionally freezes when the drummer stirs but carries on with work once he's settled again.

Adam has gone since Carly's visiting, they're staying in a hotel not too far away and Ross has claimed the pull out sofa.

Tommie had disappeared a while ago, moaning about something that Claeb had done again as she talked on the phone with this new Phoebe he is yet to meet.

When she does return he doesn't realise it, he's working on a song muttering to himself as he does.

"One verse isn't good enough Matty, come on...."

He sighs, replaying it and she grabs the headphones quietly putting them on to listen to what he's working on.

'I'll quote 'On the road' like a twat

And wind my way out of the city

Finding a girl who is equally pretty won't be hard

Oh, I just had a change of heart'

She freezes, listening to the song slowly and scoffs.

The noise is what catches Matty's attention and he turns quickly, eyes widening when he sees her standing behind him, "Baby-"

She shakes her head and starts walking out of the studio, he's quick but careful as he moves George's head, chasing her down the hallway.

"Baby, wait, Tom. Tommie!"

"What?"

"Wait, I need you- need your help." He says stopping her, with a hand placed on her upper arm.

"That's it?"

He swallows then nods silently, "That's it?" She asks the question again, hoping the change of tone, from annoyance to desperation, will open his eyes to the hurt she feels.

"Yeah, uh-"

"Is that song about me?"

"Tom-"

"Is it?" She asks, "It's my words, Matty. I called you a twat, I- I said all those things to you Matty. 'A Change of Heart' are you fucking serious?"

"I was struggling to write," He says, tongue peeking out to wet his lips, "I needed song inspiration, it was exciting."

"Exciting." The word tastes weird to her, like copper and cigarettes.

He steps back, maybe that wasn't the right word. "I can't take this."

"Take what?"

She moves her hand around the gap between them, "This, this weird thing that's been going on. I... I miss us."

"There was never an 'us', Tommie."

"That's not what-" She sighs and turns away as the lift dings at their level, "Not what I meant. And you know it."

She moves her foot so the doors won't close, turning her body to him, "I miss what we were."

"What was that?"

"Friends, bandmates, I'm not entirely sure. But we didn't constantly disagree like this, we had movie nights, we talked, it wasn't...weird."

"Yeah, well that was ruined when you got a boyfriend."

She scoffs, a violent sort of scoff he's sure she never would've been able to do if she never smoked in the first place.

"No, it got ruined the day you decided to stick your tongue down my throat and say it meant nothing."