HeartBreak. || DNF

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TW - Mature Language

I'm sat in the kitchen by myself scrolling through my phone. Everyone else was still asleep, It was a long day yesterday. Sapnap was kind enough to let everyone stay over. 

George was asleep on the couch whilst Jay was on the floor. I don't know where Karl and Quackity were but I didn't really want to know. 

I was scrolling through Tiktok. Apps like this just wasted time but what was I gonna do with this time anyway? 

As I'm scrolling I land on a video of a couple on a date kissing.

I couldn't help but think about the kiss me and George shared. I don't have any regrets whatsoever but it felt too soon. 

Not that I didn't know much about George, I know basically everything. He was so sweet, he wouldn't hurt a fly. 

I should probably talk to him about it but I'm not sure how he's feeling. 

"What are you doing?" A voice calls next to me. 

I groan recognizing that annoying voice. I turn my head seeing Jay peek over to look at my phone. 

I turn my phone away, "What?" 

He shrugged, "Just was curious to what you were doing." He laughs walking over to the fridge. I roll my eyes irritated by his presence. 

He takes out a jug of milk and a bowl of cereal. I study his every move as his eyes notice me staring. "You want some?" He asks pouring the milk.

I don't bother answering his question but I continue to watch him.

He was much older since the last time I saw him was when we were dumb teenagers. He was 18 and I was 15. 

Even though he was 3 years older it felt like I was the mature one. Sure, I was immature at times but you can't blame me. 

He somehow always managed to piss me off without trying.

He scoffs looking at me, "You gonna keep staring?" I go back on my phone, "I don't like cereal." 

"God Dream, what do you even like?" He asks.

I deeply exhale getting sick of his voice, "What do you want Jay." He shrugs again throwing the empty cereal box away.

He leans his elbows on the counter whilst eating his cereal. "You need to buy more cereal by the way." He points out shoving the cereal in his mouth.

"Not all of us are rich like you." I say pissed off. He looks up at me scoffing, "Really? Look at this place, you guys have a whole ass theater!"

"I don't live here. I live with mom." I say. He looks at me for a few seconds before sighing.

"Alright then," He pulls out his wallet before casually handing me a few dollars. It was about $60.

"What is this for?" I say puzzled. He shrugs again, "Use it as you will I guess. I'm gonna meet up with some friends, I'll talk to you later." He says putting on his shoes.

He really gave me $60? Douchebag.

I look down at the money before watching him leave the house. 

It was getting bad. It was getting so bad to the point where I didn't recognize myself anymore. I wanted to get better, I really did.

For everyone, for Sapnap, for Quackity, for mom, for George. 

But I just couldn't get better. I hadn't put a single thing in my mouth for about a week. I couldn't look at food without wanting to throw up. 

Maybe it was time I go outside again. I hated the city. Crowds of people shoving you, it feels like my lungs stop working when I'm around people.