You love him... There was no mistaking it.
He had a hold on you, that seemed unbreakable...
Logan Walker is a mystery wrapped inside a riddle – he is steadfast and cunning...
He is your saving grace, while you were his chance to be a better man.
That was before Rorke...
Before he had been labeled with the letters you never wanted to see...
M.I.A.
P.O.W.
But now...
Logan is home, safe within your walls – and though he is a shell of the man he used to be, you refuse to abandoned him, like doctors told you too.
He still carries flickers of beautiful bright blue hues, whenever the light hits right...
He still wears your dog tags, it's the one thing Rorke didn't take from him...
The mask is long since bloodied and buried where no one can dig up his secrets... You made sure of it.
You will always make sure of it.
-
It's been a difficult last few weeks, Logan comes out of his shell, once in the greatest blue moon, then hides when Keegan and the others visit...
During the night, he refuses to leave your side – a safeguard that won't bend nor break in the eye of the storm.
But today had been different...
Logan is on edge.
He's trapped himself in your room, locked the door and refusing to answer.
You respect his need for space... To distance himself when it gets to be too much... And though you want to protest and protect him... You stop outside the door, tray of food in hand and place it on the floor.
You give a soft knock, "Sweetheart... No rush, but lunch is at the door, when you are ready..." You feel the hiccup in your voice and try your best to swallow the lump stuck in your throat, "I... I love you."
It's nighttime before you hear the click of the door and watch from the corner of your eye as Logan steps into the hallway, ignoring the now long since cold meal you had prepared for him.
You watch him, as he steps into the living room... Eyes dark with purple, shadowy circles... You can see the lack of sleep in his eyes.
His shoulders are sluggish.
You can see the remnants of his nightmares wearing heavily on him.
Putting your book down, you sit up a bit, "Hi..."
Logan stops at the end of the couch, eyes glossed over with tears, "Hi... Um, is it okay if I sit?"
It breaks your heart to hear him so broken... In all the years you had known Logan, he was strong and bold and didn't waver from battle.
You had never seen him so broken...
You give him a small nod, motioning for him to sit.
You want to reach out and touch him, but you don't want to invade his space – he needs to trust you and come to you...
So, you wait...
You watch...
He struggles with his words, opening and closing his mouth multiple times before he finally gives up, meeting your understanding gaze.
"I'm sorry..."
"For what, sweetheart?"
"For everything... You don't deserve this."
You try to process his apologize – you don't want it... This wasn't something you did because others told you too, this was something you did out of love...
"Logan, there is nothing to be sorry for."
"But there is," he averts his eyes to the fireplace, "You waited for me... Even when you didn't have to, and everyday since, you've been at my side, refusing to leave me, no matter how harsh I am..."
"I..." You sit up a bit straighter, crossing your legs, "Logan nothing you have done is your fault, and I know that... If you need to take your anger out on me, then do it... If you need to cry, to scream, or to have a few moments where the world outside of this, doesn't exist, then I will do it... I love you."
Logan's eyes graze over you, as the touch of hot, fresh tears caress down his sunken face, "We can start over... I'll do anything, everything can be perfect... Just please don't leave me."
He nearly begs you, and you can hear the fear in his voice – the twinkling shimmers of his nightmares and broken hopes coming to light...
He doesn't want to be alone...
You are his anchor...
A sole reminder of the good you still see in him.
"I would never leave you," you shake your head, biting back the tears in your own eyes, hands itching to hold him.
There is a brief pause that lingers between you two, as Logan scoots closer to you; you can see the exhaustion in his eyes, the red rims as his tears had finally won.
You welcome him into your embrace, holding onto him as if his life depended on it...
"You're safe," you whisper into his hair, "We can start fresh tomorrow morning," you press a gentle kiss to his forehead, as he buries his face into your stomach, "For now get some sleep... I'll keep the nightmares away."
