My Angel~Courtney x fem! Reader

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"MAMAAAAAAAAAA!!!!" D/n wailed. You ran outside to see what was happening.
"What's wrong, what's wrong?!" You asked, trying to catch your breath. She was sitting down and turned away from you.
"Come look! It's urgent!" She said. "Okay, okay!" You went over and bent down.
"Look, I found a ladybug! That means I got good luck! My good luck ladybug! I'll name him lucky!" She smiled, showing off her two missing front teeth.
You rolled your eyes and sighed with a smile. "That's cool and all, hun, but maybe don't scream like you're dying next time, kay?"
"Mhm!" She nodded and got up, starting to play in the yard. "Y/NNNNNNNNNN!!!!" Courtney wailed.
You groaned and got up. "Oh, yeah. I forgot I have to raise two kids and one wife." You muttered sarcastically as you walked inside.
She was holding s/n out in front of her and plugging her nose. You snickered and took him from her. "Somebody needs a change."
He smiled and cooed, putting his hands on your face and giggling.
"Damn right. He smells like a dumpster fire. And not the good kind." She gagged.
"Don't you like every kind of dumpster fire?" You questioned. "Yeah, but not that one." She wrinkled up her nose.
You rolled your eyes. "S/n is almost two years old, and it amazes me that you still don't know how to change a diaper!"
"That's cuz you never taught me!"
That's cuz you refuse to learn!"
That's cuz it's gross!"
"Yknow, what? C'mere, I'm teaching you." You grabbed her hand and pulled her over to the changing station.
"Noooooo, it's disgusting!" She whined. "Shut up!" You sighed and grabbed a fresh diaper then started to direct her on how to do it.
"Now show me how to do it." You said. "Uh, okay." She messily tied on the diaper. "There!"
"Uh, yeah. You need a bit more practice, I guess." You retied the diaper and put him down.
He clapped his hands and went over to play with his toys. Courtney was staring at the dirty diaper.
"Courtney, if you eat that, I will never kiss you again."
Silence.
"Relax! I wasn't going to anyway!" She said, quickly throwing it away.
You rolled your eyes and put d/n's homework in her bag. She was outside, playing with Ryan while waiting for the bus. Barney waved and you smiled, walking outside with Courtney and s/n.
"So, you finally make it to the bus stop on time."
"Shut up, he takes forever getting ready."
"Yeah, d/n is way worse. She has to say bye to all her stuffed animals or she won't leave. And sometimes she has to redo it because she "did it wrong". Whatever that means." You sighed, looking at your daughter.
She smiled her mischievous grin that she got from Courtney. She was holding her hands behind her back. You raised an eyebrow. "What do you have?"
"Mommy, can I keep him as a pet?" She held up a dead rat and you gagged. "Don't touch it, you'll catch something!"
"But mamaaaaa! His name is ratatouille!" She said, hugging the dead rat. Courtney took it from her and ate it. "Problem solved."
D/n gasped and teared up. "Courtney, what have you done?" You said, knowing what was about to happen.
"What? I was helping and- oh no." She noticed d/n's red face. She inhaled then screamed and cried.
"Courtney, you deal with this."
"Why me?!"
"Because it's your fault!"
"Would you have rather her gotten rabies?!"
"No, but you didn't have to eat it! Now you probably have rabies!"
"Oh, whatever! Demons can't-"
"Shut up, the bus is coming. Honey, calm down. We'll get you... a new pet. It'll be waiting for you when you get home." You said, trying to calm her down.
She sniffled and wiped her eyes. "Really?"
"Oh, shit. Why did I just promise her that?"
"Uh, yep. If you go on the bus and have a good day at school, there will be a pet waiting for you when you get back."
She smiled and hugged you. "Thank you, mama!" You sighed and smiled, rubbing her head. "You're welcome."
The bus rolled up and Ryan and d/n got on the bus. You felt a tear roll down your cheek. Courtney squeezed your hand.
"Come on, we've been over this. No crying cuz your kids are growing up, toots. If anything, you should be happy. We're always one day closer to getting them outta our hair."
"But they are my babies." You picked up s/n. "Ever since we adopted them, I knew they were special. And you did too, even if you didn't wanna admit it."
"Ugh, for the love of Satan. Of course I love these kids, but they get on my damn nerves." She sighed and plucked s/n out of your hands. He cooed and nuzzled her and she smiled slightly. "I'm glad you changed my mind about adoption."
"Me too. Now, we've gotta find a pet for d/n before she gets home."
"Gotcha. I'll go get the Cerberus."
"Absolutely not. We are getting her a normal pet."
"Like what?"
"Hell, I don't know. Let's go to the fucking pet store, dumbass!"
"Let's get her a dog!" Barney and pugsley said.
"NO!" You and Courtney said in unison.
"Wait, why not?"
"Dogs are too much work."
"Yeah, let's get a hairless cat."
"Oh my go- just teleport us to the pet store."
"Sheesh, okay your majesty." She grabbed your hand and teleported you. "Okay, let's see what we can find."
Courtney ran up to a cage of mice. "Look! This is literally perfect, let's get her one of these things!"
"Yeahhhh...." You pointed to the cage of snakes next to her, indicating the mice were food for them.
"Oh my god... you're right! Let's get her a snake!"
"No you- first of all, those mice are food, and second of all, she's only seven! If we're getting her a snake, let's wait till she's a little older. Let's start with something small." You said, walking over to some hamsters.
"Ew, no. Those smell gross. Let's get something less smelly. Like a hairless cat."
"What is your obsession with hairless cats?"
"It's because I am a hairless cat."
"What-"
"OOH, LOOK, BIRDS!" She ran over to the parakeets. "Hey, say Lucifer."
"Courtney, these aren't the type of birds that talk." You rolled your eyes. "Then what do they do?"
"Uh, shit?"
"Ew. Moving on!" She went over to the ferrets. "Hey, these little things are cute."
"They poop too."
"Eugh, well what here doesn't poop?"
"Courtney, everything in this pet store shits!"
"And this is exactly why we should just get her a Cerberus!"
"So you're telling me Cerberus' don't poop?"
"... well, they do, BUT THATS BESIDES THE POINT!"
"Then what- wait..." You walked over to the fish. "Perfect!"
"Do they not poop?"
"Obviously, they do, Courtney. But they are the perfect starter pets!" You looked at a happy little goldfish. "How about this one?"
"Nah, let's get this." She pointed at a fish labeled aggressive. "Courtney, no. Cuz you know she's gonna want to stick her finger in the bowl."
"Well, then she'll learn her lesson."
"BITCH, SHE IS AUTISTIC!"
"I knowwwwwww, but she has to learn!"
"Learn what? When will she use the lesson of don't stick your finger in a fishbowl in life?"
"Well-"
"Shut up. The woman of the house has made up her mind and we are getting this one." You pointed at the goldfish.
"Yes ma'am!" She saluted. "But that means I get to pick out the fish tank!"
You sighed. "Okay, fine."
She went over to the fish tanks and pointed at one that held all the glowing fish. "That one."
"Courtney, that's not for sale."
"Then why is it in the pet store?"
"TO HOLD THE- let's just get this." You sighed, picking up a little fish tank.
"Yeah, that one's better anyway." She started gathering up things to decorate the tank. You chuckled and went to pay.

You got home and Barney and logs were babysitting s/n. They were trying to figure out how to change a diaper.
"Am I the only one who knows how to change a diaper in this family?!" You said.
"You know we adopted Ryan when he was five, we never had to change a diaper before!"
"Oh. My lord. Give me the child." You plucked him out of their hands and began to change him.
"You're all simple minded idiots."
"Ugh, sisters never change."
"Barney, I will unalive you. COURTNEY, FOR THE LAST TIME, DO NOT EAT THE FISH!"
"I wasn't, I was just setting up the tank!"
"You lie! And that's not how you- oh my goddddddd!" You groaned and went over to set up the tank.
After an eternity, you were done. You collapsed on the couch. "Finally!"
Courtney came up to you, holding her hands behind her back. "Uhhhh, sooooo, don't get mad but-"
"Courtney, I swear if you ate the fish-"
"No, no, it's..." She showed you the phone, showing the school was calling. "Oh, lord." You picked up. "Hello?"
"Hello, this is mrs dingleberry. (Bc yes :> ) We need you to come pick up your daughter early."
"What's wrong, is she sick?"
"No, we're having a problem with her head butting her classmates."
".... What?"
"Yes."
"Let me talk to her."
There was a moment of silence then you heard her cheery little voice. "Hi, mommy!"
"D/n, why are you head butting people?"
"Because you told me that's how you fight."
"What?"
"When I asked you to show me cool fighting skills, you said it's not about the fists, it's about what's in here. And you pointed to your head."
You sighed and rubbed your forehead. "..... I'll be there to pick you up in a bit."
"Okay! Bye mommy, I love you!"
You smiled, knowing you couldn't stay mad at her. "I love you too, baby." You finished talking with the teacher and got up, grabbing your keys.
"Courtney, I have to go pick up d/n, please look after s/n."
"Gotcha." She pat his head and smiled innocently.
".... Yeah, I don't trust you, you're coming with me."
"Ugh, fine." She picked him up and he made airplane noises. She flew him around the house and into the car. You got in and drove to the school.
"Hey, remember that time I beat up a bully for you here?"
"Do not bring that up, and that was in high school. You didn't even know me in elementary school."
"Really? Are you sure?"
"Yes! Hi, I'm here to pick up d/n guttman." You said as you entered the front office, quickly changing your tone of voice.
They called her to the office and she skipped down the hallway. "Mama!"
"Alright, let's get you home." You sighed, taking her hand. She smiled and kissed her brother's cheek. "That's my brother, s/n." She said to the lady in the office, who smiled and nodded.
"So, is there a surprise for me?" She said eagerly. "Guess you'll have to wait and see." You smiled.
You got home and she ran over and yanked on the doorknob. "KEYS, MAMA, KEYSSSS!"
"Okay, okay!" You unlocked the door and let her inside. She ran in and started searching the house. She went in her room and screamed in delight. "A FISHIE!"
You smiled and entered the room with Courtney and s/n. "A fishy, thank you, mamas!" She smiled, tapping on the glass.
"Fishy, fishy, fishy!" S/n giggled and clapped his hands.
"So, what're you name him?"
"I think I'll name him... fish."
"Oh-" "Yknow, what? I think that's the perfect name for a fish." Courtney smiled and pat her head.
"Thanks, mom!" She smiled. Courtney grinned up at you and you gave her a thumbs up.
"Now, don't take him out of the tank, okay?" "I know, mama, I know."
You put s/n down for his afternoon nap and flopped on the bed with Courtney. "Jesus, what a fucking day."
"Yeah. Just wait till they ask for dessert." "I knowwwww!"
Courtney smirked and stared at you. "What?"
"Nothing. Just can't get over how beautiful you are~"
"Shut up." You blushed. "Hey, it's true. Remember the first time we met?" She chuckled.
"Yeah, you gonna jump on my brothers head again and try to sacrifice us?"
"Are you still not over that?" "I am. I just love messing with you." He smirked. "Ugh, I love you, sweetheart~"
"I love you too, shorty~"
"UGH!"

OMFG FINALLY FINISHED THIS CHAPTER YALL R PROBABLY LIKE BITCH FINALLY A NEW CHAPTER IM SRRY IVE HAD NO MOTIVATION FOR THIS BOOK also warning it's almost the end