Until Death - Red Dead Redemption II

Act XIII: Regrouping With Blood

I don't know what to do now.

I tried to talk to Dutch but he wasn't there to be reasoned with. He gave me a choice. Between Jack and the gang. I figured out why they all were so sour all of a sudden, they knew about Jack and I. And as I worried it didn't go over well with them, after all to them it's disturbed. Rancid. And possibly evil.

How could Dutch do something like that to me, how could he just throw me out like some mistake? He was for all its worth my father, more of a pa then I've ever had. But he threw over twenty years together away in a moment just because I'm seeing someone who happens to be a man. Micah even called us queers. I don't think I'll ever see little Jack again. Think Abigail is afraid I'll do something to the boy. People seem to figure that men who see men are perverted. And are all some kind of creep after kids. I'd sooner castrate myself then ever hurt the kid.

To think of all the money. All the time. All the effort I put into the gang hurts. I've wasted half my life with a group of bastards who abandoned me. I'm at a complete loss. One part of me wants to kill them all, make them hurt as much as they just hurt me. But I couldn't ever bring myself to hurt them. And revenge doesn't pay. It doesn't do a damn thing.

After we left we got into a fight. I and Jack. He nearly stabbed me in my neck, but he stopped himself. It did frighten me a bit. Never thought there'd be someone as mad as myself. Seems like he's quite the fighter. I've never lost a fight like that. But to be fair we both got some good hits in.

The fight was painful but what hurt more was learning just where he came from. His folks were killed. For a debt his pa couldn't repay. If he ever finds out what I've done to collect debts I don't think he'd ever forgive me. In fact he might kill me. But the collectors didn't stop with his pa. They killed his ma and his sister as well. But not before raping her. How could someone do that? Something so deeply disturbed and soulless. Sure killing ain't that kind but it's out of necessity for us. There ain't no need for assaulting some folk like that.

That's not even where his story ended. He was taken. And used as some sort of camp prostitute, for almost a year. I can't even think of what that'd do to myself, I reckon I would have snapped hard enough to level a state. But he didn't he thought smartly. Tricking his way out where he killed the whole camp in their sleeps.

Burnt the men who killed his family to death in a cabin. But not before one escape and cut him up real good. He hasn't really spoke since he told me. He's been sitting by the water for a few hours now, just staring like a corpse. I've been sitting here. Writing. Drawing. What ever happens to come to me to bypass time.

I'm mad. Madder than usual. Dutch did something so hateful I don't think I can live with the thought of them all moving on and leaving me in the dirt. But without me they'll crumble. Made that gang nearly all its damn money.

I'm gonna take my wagon at least. Won't be deterred by no thing they throw at me. It's my wagon. Think I'll talk to Jack about stealing the thing back. I'm starting to worry about him.

After closing his journal Arthur walked carefully to Jack, who was sat on a log facing Flat Iron Lake. He wasn't making any sort of noise or movement. Just watching.
"You okay?" Arthur asked, taking a quick seat next to the brunette. Looking over at the boy.
"Why'd you choose me?" He asked, shakily.
"Pardon?"
"Dutch. The gang. Why'd you choose me over them?" Jack looked over at Arthur, who sat baffled and a bit nervous as he mustered up a response.
"Why wouldn't I?"
"Arthur they're yer family. You done known them since you were a boy. Why'd you choose me over them? You just met me. You don't know me half as well as you know them I assume. I don't want you to abandon all the fellers you know to stand by me."