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How many days are left before you realize how beautiful it is to just exist? How many hours before a thought comes up on your doorstep to embrace you with familiarity? How many nights will you have to count thinking it will be your last breath.
I think you're beautiful. No. You're beautiful. I see beauty in your chaos. I see beauty in your pain. I see beauty even when you think it's not to be called beautiful.
You have so much buried in you. The sentiments that allow you to come up with stupefying words and make them a ray of hope to others. And I hope you have it with you, too. I hope you see yourself just as how you see wounds and scars beyond traumas and unresolved pain from the pasts. I hope you are also able to create a majestic sunrise just as how you give sunshine and light to the world that makes it even more beautiful to live in.
You are beautiful. And by beautiful, I mean beautiful. More than flawless skin that makes you instantly think of a popular, established whitening product that celebrities and the rich would go for; more than a standard of beauty where having braces, silky long hair, thin hour-glass body, and luxuries are to be loved and craved by many. Your chaos is what makes you even more deserving to be loved.
I understand that you are struggling. If no one tells you that it's ok, then let me tell you that it's ok. When you don't have it all figured out yet. When the only thing that comes into your head is breathing or lying in bed. Even when the only thing that you think of is to free your mind from all the mess that vexes you and keeps you from peace. It's ok. You are not forced to say anything or solve anything. But you are still beautiful tho. And brave. I think it's an understatement to just call you beautiful because you are more than beautiful. You're brave. And it makes you stand out.
It's just amazing how you try to calm the evil that crawls and knocks and ruins your mind just to not disturb the people that you care about. It is an act of bravery to choose to fight the dark, the demons, the evil, the ugly, the pain with the strength that you have. You have so much love for people and I hope you also receive the love that you are so deserving to have. You can cry on my shoulders if you want. Scream or sing so loudly until your heart beaks free from unimaginable heartache. Jump and leap so high until you bounce back to a world where wings could be granted. You can fly with me for as long as your imagination and fantasies can take you. Dream with me until you wake up with nostalgia to open your eyes to a world where kindness and love can foster.
I love you.
I love everything about you. I love all the little details of the parts of you that you conceal from the prying eyes. I love your smile. Your eyes. Your tantalizing countenance that gives off warmth. I love how you are here. Living. Breathing. I love how invested you are in wanting to solve what's hindering you from speaking your heart. I love how you put up a mask – the smiling one– only to hide the deepest part of you, the vulnerable, the crying, the screaming, the seeking to be understood with just only the silence. I love your scars. I love you.
