Hope

Time travel

To the hearts that always get hurt, may we find someone who will never let our ships sink, and will never let our cups run empty.

I have been so immersed by how you charmed me with so much intensity on the first day. I swore I felt it in my bones wobbling as my eyes caught a glimpse of you.

The next day I whispered in the wind that trekked from the horizon. I told the wind so many things about you.

I could just imagine you and I. By the shore, with waves waving their hello. With the heavens pouring their tears of joy. I could see you so vividly with that ecstatic look in your eye. And with that red lipstick you painted on my lips as we collide.

Like the Big Bang, my veins bumped into a big bang and walked their way out of my skin and bones.

I could see you standing on the sand, staring at the sun. My dress was dancing freely. And your head turned to me. In the blink of an eye I saw you say the sweetest words I've ever heard: "You're the most beautiful woman on Earth."

And darling, I could die.

With the fresh blast of the wind, our feet surmised their movement to meet each other. Our arms held with softness and gentle; not minding the world that looks at us as we danced with grace.

I could see you; the bomb was ticking; the time stopped.

I could see you.

The keys no longer in the shore.

I could see you.

I could feel you.

Chasing after me in the darkness of the forest locked in the wilderness. In the outdoor of no doors to exit. In the cage with no keys to escape from. I could see you; with impertinence and the nerve to break me into a nerve-wracking way, stretching and burning my skin to the bottom, molding my body like a dough.

When your hunger screams for something to eat; when your thirst holds something to drink, I gave them to you hoping I'd be the best recipe you would ever have and I'd be enough. But you looked for a cheap-selling recipe from an inadequate, shabby little fast-food restaurant that lurks cheaters and flirts.

I could see you; killing me with every lie; breaking me until I die.

You casually said, "I hurt you" and those words I would forever resent: "I'm sorry."

In the cold of the wilderness with my cold painted dress, I sought for a time travel back in the past: I was put into a time where you had me waiting for you. Next to our room was another woman.

I could see you.

I could see me; begging for you not to leave me when all you did was go to her.

And I could see me; chanting every shameful word I could get, cursing you to hell.

I could taste the bittersweet lies that you painted on my lips as we collide. I could hear all the words that you said with little to no emotions buried in your eye. I could smell the scent of another woman when you told me I'm the only one.

I could see you, staring at me while I bleed to death.

I could feel you.

Like a Big Bang in the universe, I was met with a big bang smashing and squeezing my own little world until it banged on the wall with your written promises.

I saw the signs now: the disrespect of leaving me behind when all I did was stay. The slipping of your hand when you know I was holding you tight.

The leaving me half-naked while you hurriedly opened the door to exit. The letting me crave your touch and presence when all you did was leave me again, wondering when will you be back home.

But I was never your home.