Lucidity

30

There are times when I think I could be dreaming. I grew up in a sect that had so many regulations and rules, and strict teachings. I never spoke out much of anything on how I felt about it all. I became even more quiet after Mother died. My brother was there for me more than anyone else. Shufu tried to be that father figure we needed but he was never one who wanted his own children but didn't mind teaching them. Since Father went through such difficult hardships, Shufu made sure my brother and I didn't follow that same path. It did not work though.

My life turned upside down the day Wei Ying came into my life. That night we fought, I remember him being the most beautiful person I have ever seen. His smile brought back the warmth that left me long ago. His laugh filled my soul with butterflies. I did not know how to express myself or how to handle a person like him. He was so unruly and mischievous and I was so rigid and followed every rule by the book.

There were days where I wished that I wasn't so hard on him because when he was struggling and the world turned against him, he wouldn't hear me out. Because I pushed him away, he did the same to me. After he died I thought that I would never be the same again. That was until I met Baoshan and she had a way for me to bring him back to me. I made a promise to Wei Ying that I would love him, marry him, and bind myself to him in every way possible...and I did.

It took some time but it became known that A'Ying was framed for everything that happened. Even my brother was hurt and taken advantage of. Now my brother found someone who will always love and protect him the right way. Ren Guang has become someone who I became grateful for, as he stuck with my brother when I did not. Though, my brother understood that my priorities were more focused on A'Ying.

Now, A'Ying and I have a small place of our own, and a son we love very much. He managed to make amends with Jiang Wanyin but that was only for the sake of his Shijie. As he and I were not associated with any sect, we traveled together quite often. We would take A'Yuan with us and teach him on the road. He became a great cultivator, especially since he is also a disciple of Baoshan's.

It was late one night and A'Yuan had just gone to bed. We were back home after a long trip but it was fun. A'Yuan would have back to Baoshan's in the morning so right after he ate dinner he cleaned up for bed and went to sleep as he was pretty tired. A'Ying and I were cuddling in bed together. I always loved the weight of his body on mine when we cuddle, it lets me know that he is still here with me.

"Lan Zhan?"

"Hmm?"

"Where do you wish to travel next? Do you want to go somewhere without A'Yuan this time and let him get caught up with his training with Baoshan?" He asked.

"It might be a good idea," I said, "and we can go wherever you want."

"I am not sure," he said, "you and I never really got to spend a little honeymoon anywhere after we married. Maybe we can find somewhere nice to go for a few days."

"We could, Baoshan might have some ideas on where we could go," I told him.

"Honestly, it doesn't matter where we go, as long as I am with you, I am up for anything," he said and sat up, straddling my lap, "I am actually very grateful that you took time to bring me back to life...even though there would have been a possibility that my name might not have ever been cleared."

"This might sound selfish, but I can't live in a world where you are not in it," I said, "back when we first met, I felt there was something special about you. I never felt cold whenever you smiled at me and I would get goosebumps every time you laughed. You did something to me that I never knew could happen. I thought maybe love and emotion left me long ago but you proved me wrong."

"I have to admit, when I first laid my eyes on you, I don't think I was breathing," A'Ying said, "You are so beautiful to look at and I found that even though you were boring, I still found you interesting."

I chuckled and wrapped my arms around him, pulling him closer so our chests were pressed together, "You found my boring character interesting?" I asked.

He nodded, "I kept trying because I felt maybe you were not used to someone trying to make friends with you. After I was lost in the mounds for three months, I only pushed you away because I knew you'd disagree with the methods I used...even though I didn't have a choice but I didn't want to tell anyone why either. I thought if anyone found out I was mediocre, I'd get bullied more than I already did."

"I understand it all now and I am glad we are together now," I said, "I am telling you right now that I am never letting you go."

"I do not want you to, I want to love you forever and a day. I want to love you in my next life and the next one after that. In every lifetime, I want to spend them with you," he said, "I love you so much, and I always will."

"And I love you too, A'Ying, more than anything else in the world," I said.

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Thank you all so much for Reading Lucidity. There is a book I am working on called You Are The Reason, and it is linked to this story. It starts at an earlier time as it follows Ren Guang and his life, who he is, and how he ended up with Lan Xichen. It is a Lan Xichen and OC fan fiction. I hope you enjoy this book.

More stories to come. 😊