We postponed our wedding. I decided that I wasn't ready for a big commitment when I'm utterly broken. So, we decided to talk about it some more. Our wedding is gonna be in August.. I hope that I can get better by then..
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It's now July. Dad stopped talking to me completely. He told me I deserved better and he would think about showing up at my wedding. My sister and I have actually talked a bit more. We're about to go wedding shopping. Travis and I moved into our new apartment. We've been focused on choosing the best things for our wedding. He doesn't understand that I don't need a big fancy wedding. A small one in Mom's backyard would be good enough.
My sister showed up around noon. I pulled open the door and embraced her tightly. She smiled at me warmly.
"Hey, Little Sis." I smiled at her.
"Hey," I grabbed my keys off the table while she talked to Travis.
"Alright, babe. We'll be back." I kissed his cheek.
"Have fun."
We entered Marie's Wedding Emporium and I forgot how to breath as I looked at all the beautiful dresses and tuxedos that lined that wall. Ashley looked how I felt. An overwhelming feeling overtook me as the clerk greeted us.
"Hello there. Do you have any questions?" She was a short young woman with long brown hair and blue eyes. I just smiled at her.
"We were looking for a wedding dress that wasn't a traditional white." She nodded.
"We may have something for you. Follow me." She gestured towards the back of the store.
The first few dresses in the back of the store didn't catch my eye. I tried on a long mermaid style purple dress with a black train. The dress itself was beautiful, but it didn't look right with my pale complexion. By two o'clock, I was irritated and overwhelmed. Nothing seemed to look okay on me. We walked a little bit more around the store. I laid my eyes on a beautiful mermaid style deep red dress. I grabbed my size off the wall and half ran to the dressing room.
"You are stunning, Little Sis." I stared at myself in the three way mirror. I did look good.
"Do you really think so?" I asked. She nodded.
"Let's go find you some shoes." The clerk said coming up to us.
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My wedding was getting closer and closer. I know that Travis has been in my life for the last two years. I know that I love him to death. But, I'm terrified. What if he starts to question his feelings? What if he stops loving me? I know that there is someone out there that can love him more than me. Someone prettier. Someone nicer. Someone who has a perfect body without the scars. Without the burns. I know that I love him. I know that I do not want anyone else for the rest of my life. I do know that when I close my eyes at night, I want him to be lying next to me.
Wedding day. I sat up in bed and took a deep breath. Today was the very day. The day I have been dreaming about since I was five. They say today is the second best day of my life. The first being the day I have children. I pulled my anxiety pills out of my medicine cabinet and took a few. I don't know why I'm scared. Everyone is scared of the unknown and I may have made it this far, but Im scared of the unknown future.
Hannah and Maddi wouldn't let me see Travis and the boys wouldn't let Travis see me. They started when we woke up and its now turning towards six. I've spent the whole day by myself. I went to a salon and got my nails done and then went to hair salon and died it and I am currently curling it. My red dress lay hanging up in the closet. I sat on the bed and thought about what everyone said. I am not worthless. I am beautiful. I am worthy. I am. I am. I am. Someone knocked on the door.
"Can I come in?"
"Yea, sure." Maddi and Mom came in. Mom was on the verge of crying.
"Are you ready?" I shook my head.
"I still need to put on the dress and veil." Mom grabbed my dress and helped me into it.
Mom stepped away from the mirror and let me see myself. For the first time in a long time, I actually saw the beauty. In the red dress, my hips looked amazing. The red showed off the hourglass frame. My brown hair was curled into loose curls. My tan complexion looked beautiful. I brushed a hand down my dress and smiled into the mirror.
Dad looped his arm through mine and smiled at me. Everyone left the room and I fought back tears. I never realized how old he looked. He has crow's feet around his eyes and his forehead wrinkles when he smiles, making him look a few years older. I wrapped my arms around his waist and allowed myself to listen to his heart beat one more time.
"I love you, Alicia."
"I love you, too, Daddy." He smiled at me before stepping out of the room.
My heart almost stopped as I walked onto the aisle. Everyone was standing in a mixture of reds, whites, blacks, and pinks. Travis stood on the alter with a giant smile spread across his face. His tuxedo was black with a white undershirt, red vest, and black bow tie. I stared ahead and gripped my rose bouquet tighter as my hands began to sweat. Dad stopped me and kissed my cheek. I walked down the rest of the way and held Travis's hand with my free one.
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The whole wedding was beautiful. My whole family in Oregon came down to see us. I slipped out of my wedding dress and into a simple red lace dress and put my red heels back on. My hair was still in the curly up do. I checked my makeup in the mirror and applied a bit more of my Cardinal red lipstick from Mac. I stared into the mirror a little bit longer. You made it. But, how long until you crack? Just soon enough.. I sighed before turning out the light.
A smile swept across my fragile face as I entered the party room. Travis stood in the middle of the room with a dozen of roses laying in his hands. His tux was still on and his parents stood next to him. I walked slowly over to him. He looked down at me and handed me the perfectly arranged flowers. I smiled up at him. I am the luckiest person to say that I had the opportunity to marry my best friend. The one who was here through rehab. Through my family. Through everything. I loved him. I kissed his cheek and blushed as he pushed a stray curl away from my face. Its been almost three years and he still gives me butterflies.
The party was absolutely beautiful. There was a mix of reds, whites, and blacks that made the room seem lively. When Mom pulled out the wedding cake, my heart jumped into my throat. The cake itself was a vanilla white cake with a strawberry frosting in between the layers. The cake was covered in white fondant. Each tier of the cake was drizzled with a bit of melted chocolate and edible rose petals. My favorite part was the cake topper. It was two silver hearts intertwining with two white swans in front. I looked over to see Travis staring at me with an ear to ear smile.
YOU ARE READING
Broken Promises
Teen Fiction"The most beautiful people are the ones who know defeat. Who are best friends with suffering. Who know struggle, who know loss, and who have found their own way out of their rock bottom. They have an appreciation, a sensitivity, an understanding of...
