Don't Kiss and Tell

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Disnyworks_Shipper

- For jack eyes only : When they aren't looking, i dare you to kiss Merida or Punzie, i wanna know her reaction (sorry.. Not sorry!)

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Jack: *slaps forehead* Oh, I know you're not sorry. Nobody is ever sorry. I've had more dares kissing other people than I have kissing Elsa...

Jack: *rereads fanmail* "Punz or Merida," huh? Punz, for sure. Hiccup will ice me. No pun intended.

Jack: Wait, did I just make a pun for myself?

- later -

Jack: It's noon. She's got to be baking in the kitchen or something. *peeks into kitchen*

Rapunzel: *humming as she cooks*

Jack: Jackpot! No pun intended.

Jack: Another pun?! I'm on fire.

Rapunzel: Eugene, try these ones out. I'm experimenting with new ingredients. Might write a cookbook about it one day. *holds up spoon*

Jack: *hides behind fridge* *whisper-yells to self* Fitzherbert is here?!

Eugene: *tastes the food* Mhmm! Immaculate as always, Sunshine. This cookbook will revolutionize the cooking industry! Gordon Reynolds who? *hugs Rapunzel from the back*

Rapunzel: *giggles* It's Gordon Ramsey. But thank you, Eugene!

Eugene: I love you so much, Rapunzel. If anyone were to ever happen to you-- like being dared to accept a kiss from someone who isn't me, for example. Or if someone stole all your food--I'd use all of these knives right in front of us on them and feed their bodies to Max!

Rapunzel: Uh... oddly specific. Also, you will do no such thing! *slaps Eugene's arm* Also, Max is a herbivore anyway.

Jack: *gulps*

Jack: *tiptoes away* *sighs* Merida, it is, then...

- at the living room -

Mericcup: *sitting together on the couch*

Jack: *zooms to the door* Heeey, whassuuup? *leans on the door*

Mericcup: *pulls away from each other* WE WEREN'T DOING ANYTHING!

Merida: Oh, no. Lad's leaning on the door again... somethin' terrible's gonna go down.

Jack: *fakes being offended* You judge me unfairly, Red! So, I was thinking... basically... you know. *slowly walks towards Mericcup*

Merida: Aye?

Jack: Uh... *unintelligible*...?

Merida: *laughs* What did ye say? What language are you learning this time, Grandpa?

Jack: Love language.

Mericcup: What?

Jack: *grabs Merida's face* *kisses her*

Jack: *grabs Merida's face* *kisses her*

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Hiccup: *jaw drops*

Jack: *pulls away* Eww. Tastes like a bologna sandwich.

Hiccup: *sweats* I wonder why.

Jack: *flies to the moon*

Merida: *spits* *aggressively wipes lips* *furrows brows* Another dare to kiss me again?! What's the address of this darer, I just wanna talk!

Hiccup: *holds in laughter*

Merida: Really? *raises brow at Hiccup*

Hiccup: *makes kissy noises at Merida*

Merida: *aims arrow at Hiccup's leg*

Hiccup: NO, NOT THE GOOD LEG! Forgive me...

Merida: Go get me some of that food Punzie's cooking up and I'll consider forgiveness. It smells heavenly!

Hiccup: Y-yes, ma'am! *leaves the room*

Hiccup: *returns with knives all over his body* *hands Merida the stolen food*

Merida: *eyes widen* What happened to you? Can't even survive a trip to the kitchen?

Hiccup: *drops to the floor*

Eugene: *leans on door* Me. I happened.

 I happened

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