Grian One-Shots

Totally Definitely Not Sam

Crack treated seriously fics <33

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The hermits were chilling, quiet conversions filling the room in anticipation. You see, X had recently found a possible member for the next season, so he gathered the hermits to meet him and see if they got along. They would then do a vote, and if everyone liked the new member they would join.

"I hope its a girl" Pearl said, a grin on her face. "We need another lady to keep things together."

Grian gave her a look, taking a sip of his tea. At that exact moment, the door opened and X walked in with a certain killer bunny hybrid.

Grian spit out his tea and made eye contact, his eyes wide in terror.

The mystery man froze.

After a few seconds of tension together they both screamed

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?"

"What am I doing here?" Grian exclaimed, "How'd you get past the background checks?!?"

"What do you mean, Gree-on!! I've never committed a crime in my life!" The man teased, a joking look of shock on his face."

"Don't play with me Sam, we both know you've done some terrible things. What about that time you did drugs illegally, huh?"

"You literally did it too-"

"T-Thats not relevant. What about the fac-"

"Okay what is going on here?" Xisuma interrupted, confused.

"Me and Gree-on go way back! We-"

"Gree-on and I." The bird man corrected.

Bunny man sent a glare. "Gree-on and I go way back. We met in kindergarten, and were best friends in highschool."

Grian snorted, a shit eating grin on his face. "Yeah right. I only hanged out with you because of Taurtis, Samuel Gladiator."

"NOOO WAY THATS SAM?!" Pearl yelled, her jaw on the floor (kinda)

"Awh, you told your girlfriend about me!"

"She's my sister."

"Oh."

"WAIT YOU HAVE A SISTER-?!"

"YEAH"

"BUT YOU WERE ABANDONED ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD??"

"SHUT UP SAM. FIRST OF ALL, YOU HAVE DADDY ISSUES. SECOND OF ALL, NO ONE NEEDED TO KNOW THAT."

"SAYS THE ONE WHOS PARENTS DON'T LOVE HIM."

"SAYS THE GAY FREAK."

"IM NOT GAY!"

"YOU CROSS DRESSED?"

"DO YOU NOT REMEMBER TUESDAYS?? YOU AND TAURTIS USED TO-"

Grian tackled the man, spilling his tea on his red sweater. Pearl was cackling, clutching her stomach. The rest of the hermits looked on in confusion as Grian got up, shook the dirt of his wet sweater, and sat down.

"Grian. Apologize to Sam, he didn't do anything to you."  The admin said, disappointment in his eyes.

"You guys don't know half of what he did"

"You mean you didn't tell me all?" Pearl said, no longer laughing.

"No I didn't mean you Pearl-"

"Oh-"

Silence filled the room for a bit.

"GREE-ON THAT HURTTTT" Sam said, peeling himself from off the floor. He looked around.

"Sorry was that not the right time-?"

"All jokes aside Sam, why are you here actually?" Grian said, side eyeing him.

Sam looked away, rubbing his elbow were he fell. "I just wanted a server to live on"

"You're not gonna go crazy again? Was that not your plan?"

"Grian, I only went crazy because Yuki made me stop taking my pills. They cancelled the killer rabbit instinct to kill." He shook his head. "I never wanted to hurt you, or anyone else, and I genuinely regret it. I don't expect you to forgive me, but I really am sorry."

"Oh" Grian said, a bit shocked at the man. He had gone to therapy for years, (which is why he didn't immediately get a panic attack when he saw rabbits and stuff because the author hates those types of fics) and managed to tame his ptsd, but he always thought Sam did it on purpose. He was wrong.

"Well, I'm leaving now." Sam began to walk to the door.

"But why?" Some hermit asked, confused.

"Im not ruining Grians happiness again." So he left, closing the door.

A silence filled the room.

"Wait Grian you did drugs-?" Mumbo asked, suddenly processing what the rabbit said.

"Shit." Grian sighed, the hermits dropping their jaws.

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No proof read mates, enjoy this crack immediately!!

Gay fucks.