Just a fan

Important Things

Chapter 2

Important things

-Hi, I'm a little bit busy right now, talk.

The girl didn't want to share the moment with someone else. Also, she didn't want to lose her thoughts which were flying away and bringing common sense to her. That made her judge all the choices she did before and she didn't like to question them due to real life people talks.

-Baby, I'm just checking on you. Okay? Tomorrow I'll pick you up, don't forget the documents.

-We just talked it all over in the morning and you are already nagging me. Wasn't it you who forgot the license previous time, bitch?

She was really irritated by the call of the friend. The care was the thing so different for her. She knew how to care about the others and not somebody carrying about her life. It wasn't childhood trauma, just a personal choice of being incomplete without caring some things for somebody.

-I'm trying to be organised this time, calm down the vodka in your blood lady.

She knew her very goodly, they were friends from childhood and literally one every nasty detail of each other lives to make consumptions of anything.

-Right, that's all?

-Are you okay?

-I will be soon.

What a dirty lie. It was so automatic and natural of her not to make people not worry about her. She solved the problems and not created them for the people. There was no pain in the voice and the same as no emotions existed there.

-Sure?

The friend wasn't giving up to be sure as she suspected going on something dark and messy. She knew her friend that good that this lie made her think over again and again but she knew that no help could be done to protect the friend. She was of no use and that made her feel bad for some reason. The tension grew in the air.

I was a mess for the last year. Complete, lost, mess. I worked till the dead end to just not question myself about stupid guilty things around. Trying to keep it up. ~Trying. The main thing here was that no real problems were following her. It was inside issues that she eventually gave up on solving and decided to create even bigger hole in her head.

-Lisa, I know what I am doing. I know that this concert is so much important for you and that why I'm flying with u there. Don't worry, it will be great.

-I believe u bestie. Get your ass ready and don't be drunk tomorrow without me. Let's have fun.

-Tomorrows.

I hang up. As always and she was sometimes, angry but I think now she was still overwhelmed about going to see her favourite group. She became a fan long time ago and the possibility to have fun with them made her even more thrilled. I gave her time to understand and adjust to the new changes and plus 8 people in her heart , but I think they saved her from the things that were going on. It was a kind of a must treatment that she received and I was kinda thankful to them. So, I accepted them and allowed her to add them to my playlist and tolerated never ending talks about the group.

She is just 22 stop judging, we are both in our foundation age. But I really feel I have overgrown that phase, so much long time ago. I don't know why. My family never allowed me to be child, I always had to be serious and fundamental. So, here u have a grown woman who knows what she wants and at the same time completely messed up her private life due to studies, then work and now I was independent grown child, mission is accomplished. How boring... I was all set up. I had everything and even more. Spoiled child you would say. Nah, not even close. I would see you watch my strict, obsessive, toxic parents controlling every aspect of my life, designing and ruining it. I was an only child in the family and truly deeply regretting not having a sister or brother to split the guilt and responsibility. I had no fun as a kid. Most of my friends were boys and I was happy with that. It was nice to do crazy things together, but then my parents appeared to refuse me have that, cause "I am a girl" and I had to spend time playing stupid dolls with them. They wanted a serious, flawless princess and they were pushing way too hard on me. I had a skin care routine like from 10. The good staff is that my skin is perfect (don't be jealous, I spend 3 hours in bathroom every single day) and psychological health is completely unknown.

 Nice, right? I got out of their control quite a while when they stopped getting updates on my private life. Because them knowing everything will create not only shock but ability to judge every part of my body cell until I will die from scanning. I did it all alone and was quite happy for a while until got into internal mess as I am now. I was finally free to do my things and I did them as I saw them, trying to keep my mind clear and untouched, but brainstorming inside of me went the wrong direction. I dated the guys that would make me sit up for life with no need to work and eventually I ran aways from them trying to realise the reasons why I did so. Boring. That was the only answer. Bad boys? Their timing is like fun for a week or 2 then, immaturity of their should will make you vomit. They are so broken inside and out. Its like a Pandora box with all "best" surprises you will never wanna have. When you are a good girl, you try to fix that broken apparat and when you are a bad girl you make even bigger mess that make you sank inside the mud. I was something in between. Guess a Gemini feature. My mind was too fast for them. When I met them, I knew that when I will leave him, or it will all end up with just one night stand, so I always judged if the consequences was worth it.

Fun, right?

Lets get into a time travel a little, I know you will enjoy it!

P.S. A little bit more background story.

The pics are made by me. It's my hobby btw.