How to Survive South Park

Tenorman's Revenge Part 1 - The True Time Child

P.I.T: Game - Tenorman's Revenge (beginning), Year 2546

Kyle's POV:

"Hey guys, this might be important."

"Mmf. mfmfmff mfff mmf Mffffmfmf." We're all staring at some giant ring thing in front of a giant Tenorman statue right now. I know we've done some pretty crazy shit over the years but chasing fatasses' half-brother that's somehow an even bigger asshole than him 500 years into the future to get our Xbox cartridge back is definitely among the top half.

You know, this ring kind of looks like a future TV or billboard or something. Maybe there's something on it that can help?

"Hey, can we get instructions from these?"

"Whatever, instructions are for pussies!" That explains why you never do anything right, fatass.

The ground then starts to shake and several orange portals open up with ginger kids coming from the other side. God damnit, why is it that whenever I try to disprove Cartman's stupid stereotypes, shit like this happens?

"Gingers! Kill them!" Fatass then screams something in German and jumps on one with its fake skin falling off to reveal a fucking android thing with freckles.

"GINGER BOTS! KILL THEM!" He then screams something in German again and starts beating up the first robot while the other two quickly approach the rest of us.

They never arrive though as a golden scepter and red trident each impale one before the robots blow up. Some kid with brown hair then lands in front of us and calls those weapons back to him.

"Hey dudes. How's it going, fellow Time Child?" Huh? There's more of them?

I thought Cartman was bullshitting about the whole "Time Child" thing, but after he pulled out some futuristic-looking phone, called what sounded like a sea otter, and then had a fucking portal open up in his living room which took us 500 something years into the future, I was inclined to believe his claims about that.

"The fuck, there's more time kids? Since fucking when?"

"Can't really give you an exact time since traveling to different points in time is kind of our thing. Anyway, I'm here to help you take down Tenorman."

"Oh, well why didn't you say so? Welcome aboard, New Kid. Did he steal your Xbox cartridge too or what?"

"It's Dovah and no, I'm not here for that. You'll see what I mean in a bit but I don't really have an interest in your Xbox cartridge. You can have it when we stop him. Now c'mon, let's go!" The five of us then move forward while looking around at the ginger-infested future.

Dovah's POV:

That went pretty smoothly all things considered. Cartman must really want his Xbox data back if he's willing to accept me so quickly. Whatever, I see no reason to complain.

As for enemies, if baseball bats and crowbars can tear them apart, then these guys are childsplay to me.

Side note - the ginger bots here are only slightly stronger than the ones I dealt with in the Nahkriin war despite the technology on this Earth being far more advanced than modern-day Earth tech. Looks like Tenorman was going for quantity rather than quality here.

(("Scanning... scanning... 'Time Particles' found. Begin collecting?")) I was wondering where those things were. Go for it.

In this collect-a-thon multiplayer platformer game, these things called Time Particles are all over the place and you're supposed to collect as many as possible to get a better score on levels by increasing the 'time' your character's timer has. They weren't massive particles floating around everywhere like in the game, but T.K. was still able to pick them up because of the massive upgrades it got recently.