𝙵𝚊𝚕𝚕𝚒𝚗𝚐, 𝙵𝚊𝚕𝚕𝚎𝚗 | JEONGCHAN

𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚛𝚝𝚎𝚎𝚗

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   Just like the drive to the restaurant, the drive to Chan's house was nothing but silent. We didn't say anything to each other and let the radio play lowly.

     As we approached Chan's house, my heart pounded in my chest, and my palms grew clammy. This was sort of a big step for me, moving into a space with a "stranger". Although we had sex it doesn't mean much, I think.

     The unknown filled me with apprehension. I took a deep breath. When we pulled into the driveway of the two story house, I could feel my nerves intensify.

     I scratched at my sore wrist. Immediately I stopped remembering that this might cause Chan concern and ask me questions. I did my best to hide my anxiety by fiddling with my buttons on my shirt.

     Chan parked the car and grabbed my suitcases, I followed closely behind walking up the driveway. Stepping inside the home I was instantly hit by a mix of scents, unfamiliar and foreign. A very warm Christmas and fall vibe. I like it.

     The house seemed to echo with silence, making me wearily aware of every sound I made. I cautiously followed Chan into the living room, my senses on high alert, scanning the room. As we walked through the house, Chan talked very limited times only speaking to point out the rooms and necessities.

     His voice, I couldn't deny, eased the tension though.

     I couldn't help but wonder if I would fit into this new environment, if I would be accepted for who I was, definitely not.

     He showed me to my room. It already looked very well prepared for an expected tenant. It was very spacious, the pastel blue walls added onto the comforting room. The full double bed had cream blankets. The sheets seemed to be made of silk.

No added bathroom.

     I couldn't shake the feeling of vulnerability.  I couldn't help but question whether I would be able to continue with my necessary ways of not even just living but surviving at this point. I scratched my wrist a bit not too much, but my anxiety levels were continuously rising and falling.

"All right this is your room, the dresser is empty, so you can unpack your things there."

I nodded quickly.

"When you're done meet me downstairs." He left my room, closing the door behind him.

   I glanced at the two suitcases sitting beside me. I unzipped the first suitcase, Carefully, I lifted each garment from the suitcase, gently placing it in the top drawer. As I arranged them, I couldn't help but feel a sense of sudden anticipation.

    With the first suitcase emptied and my clothes neatly organized, I moved onto the second one.

     As I unfolded my neatly packed shirts, my fingers brushed against a shirt that instantly halted my movements.

     It was one of Hyunjins shirt

     I felt a mix of emotions—surprise, anger, and a hint of sadness.

     I held the shirt in my hands, memories flooding back like an unexpected wave crashing upon the shores of my mind. It was a tangible reminder of a relationship that had once been significant. I couldn't help but reminisce about the moments we shared, both the joys and the heartaches.

      Yet, as I stood there, I realized that this shirt represented a lost love, and rather a reminder of dishonesty and pain.
    
     A familiar sickness bubbled up in my stomach, it warned me to set the shirt aside, separate from the other clothes.

     I resumed unpacking, the presence of Hyunjin's shirt overshadowed my new temporary safe home. Not allowing me to feel so safe.

     As I closed the last drawer, I surveyed my neatly organized clothes with a sense of accomplishment. Finally something I can do right...

     With a deep breath, I left the Hyunjins shirt in a separate space. I gently closed my eyes, allowing the memories to flood my mind once again.

     It's not too long since we parted ways, but my heart still holds onto the bittersweet moments we shared. I find myself constantly reminiscing about him, unable to shake off the lingering feeling of love and longing.

     The way his laughter filled the room, his infectious smile that could brighten the darkest of days—all of it replays like a movie in my mind. Our late-night conversations, the promised we made, and the way he understood me like no one else ever could.

     My body trembled, tears flowing down my face. As much as I wanted to let out a cry, I couldn't dare let Chan see this side of me.

     Every day, I find myself lost in a sea of what—ifs and could—have—been's. My mind continuously replays the moments when our paths diverged, wondering if I could have done something differently to prevent it. Wondering if I could have been better.
  
     The void he left behind is a constant ache, a reminder of the love that once was.

     As much as he hurt me. I couldn't bear to let go. I promised to never let go, no matter what...

★ ★ ★ ★ ★

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END

How will Jeongin live here?

Will he continue his ways?

What does Chan want to speak about?

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A/N

Hey! 😃 AHHAHA I haven't updated since a long while... I don't want to have to be the cliche type of Wattpad author that has been through the y/n life, but you wouldn't understand the things that have happened since I last updated ITS INSANE.
ANYWAYS just wanted to update for the readers that do read my books 🤗
My birthday is coming up very soon!!!! EEEE

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