Deep Blue Sea

ᴄʜᴀᴘᴛᴇʀ ᴛʜɪʀᴛʏ-ꜰɪᴠᴇ

Note: welcome to my yearly notification that I'm alive lol

ᴄʜᴀᴘᴛᴇʀ ᴛʜɪʀᴛʏ-ꜰɪᴠᴇ: ᴘʀᴏᴍɪꜱᴇ ᴍᴇ

ˏ 𓏧 𓏲 𓏲 𓏲 𓏲 𓋒 𓏲 𓏲 𓏲 𓏲 𓏧 ˎ

The soft sunlight seeping through the cracks of the window woke you. You were going to rub your eyes, but you quickly realised that your arms were restricted as another pair of arms were wrapped around you. Your slight movement instantly woke Okkotsu, and he instinctively hugged you tighter, nuzzling his nose into your shoulder. Shifting your body around, you patted his arm lightly in hopes of waking him. There was no way of knowing whether he was too sleepy to respond to you or was just blatantly ignoring you. Either way, that didn't matter because you whacked him in the head, toilet time is urgent.

Okkotsu let out a yelp, opening his foggy eyes to stare at you. His hair was tousled, it reminds you of when he was still a first year, lost and clueless. It just poked at your conscience especially when you saw the dark circles under his eyes, drawing you to brush your thumb over his face. Despite that he was puzzled by your sudden change in attitude, he still reached up to take your hand into his, pressing his cheek against your palm.

"It's time to wake up," you said in a gentle tone.

"I don't want to..." Okkotsu whined, his voice still soft from a deep slumber.

Letting out a huff, you pulled on his cheek harshly, "Okkotsu-kun, you're gonna miss your flight."

His eyes widened upon hearing your words, but instead of immediately getting up, he pulled you into a suffocating hug, "I don't want to go yet... please..."

You karate-chopped him mercilessly with a deadpan, "I need the toilet, let me go."

Despite knowing how urgent the situation is, Okkotsu let go reluctantly, letting his arm linger on you before you slapped his hand off and rushed to the toilet. While you were doing your business, he moved his body to where you were previously lying and felt the remaining warmth that you left on the sheets. His half-lidded eyes lingered on where you vanished, still finding himself submerged in the dream of being with you.

Okkotsu always wondered what he must do to have you rely on him more. Why won't you tell him anything? Do you not trust him? The endless questions in his mind drowned him, eating him from the inside as if he drank acid. No matter how close you were with him when he hugged you, it felt like you were so far away from him. He craved being able to touch you, but each contact just made him feel more hollowed.

As the sheets gradually turned cold, Okkotsu finally sat up. He stared blankly at his feet as a dark whirlpool twirled calmly behind his eyes. Even when the door clicked open, he didn't lift his head. His odd composture was immediately noticeable, you paused for a moment before trotting toward him, placing a hand on his shoulder and patting his head softly.

"We're going to see each other again before you know it," you tried to comfort him, moving your fingers through his hair slowly.

His hand suddenly shot up to grab your wrist. The strength of his grip made you wince in pain, but he quickly loosened his hold, still keeping his grasp firm. You could only see the top of his head, his expression was hidden under his bangs.

"What are you hiding from me?" Okkotsu whispered under his breath, you could barely make out what he was saying.

"What are you talking about?" You swallowed a breath as you felt his calloused hands rubbing against your skin.

Okkotsu suddenly pulled on your arm lightly, causing your body to fall toward him, but you stopped yourself from colliding with him by quickly placing a hand next to him. A breath from him brushed over your face, his eyelashes nearly touching yours as his dark pupils dart around to examine your expression, then finally locking eyes with you. Sometimes he felt like he understood you better than anyone else, he thought he could read your every movement, every expression. And here he is, mere centimetres away from your face, yet he felt like he was facing a stranger.

It felt to him like suffocating when you stared at him.

Okkotsu covered your eyes with a hand, letting out a soft sigh as he looked down at his lap, "... It's nothing."

Silence surrounded you as there was only blackness in your vision. Moving a hand up, you tried to take his hand off, but he wouldn't budge. The unending void within his eyes couldn't be seen through the barrier of his hand, threatening to consume your entire being. You heard the shuffling of fabrics as he moved to stand up.

"Promise me." Okkotsu's eyelashes brushed against the back of his hand as he spoke.

"What is it?" You gripped his hand nervously.

"It's okay if you lie to me," Letting out a shaky breath, he continued, "You don't have to tell me anything--I really wish you'd rely on me, to tell me everything about you, but it's okay if you don't, just please, promise me," his forehead touched yours as his voice dropped into a whisper, "promise me that you'll be safe, that you'll be alive, for me."

It felt like a needle stabbed into your chest. There was only one stab, but more followed up, and soon it felt like countless needles being stabbed into your very being. Like being thrown into cold water, you forgot how to breathe for a moment. You thought that he'd be fine without you, he'd just forget you eventually like how everyone moves on with their fallen companion.

But you know how much it hurts to lose someone.

The pain is always there, but you just get used to it, and it'll be numb until you remember what it was like to walk side by side with them.

You didn't dare think about what breaking this promise would do to him.

You thought of telling him that it's just a part of life, that everyone will die one day anyway. It's common knowledge, everyone knows that, but coming to that can't make it hurt less.

After a long, long pause, you finally opened your mouth.

"I can't promise you that," you told him, squeezing his hand tighter, "and you know why." You heard him taking a sharp breath.

"But I'm still here." You said, you felt your teeth chattering, "We're still here, don't forget that."

His hand gradually dropped on its own, and you met his teary eyes.

"I might die before you, or you might die before me, but we're still here." You spoke softly, moving his hair away from his face, "But before anything happens, we'll cherish our time together, so let's not think too much about what's going to happen, okay?" As you talked, his head rubbed against yours as he nodded with difficulty.

Without any hesitation, you wrapped your arms around Okkotsu, closing the gap between the two of you. It took him a moment, but he finally put his arms around you. At first, his arms barely even touched your form, but slowly tightened around you, and then he hugged you so tightly as if you'd disappear if he let go. He embraced you to feel that he exists, that you exist.

Okkotsu placed his lips on top of your head longingly, shutting his eyes

ˏ 𓏧 𓏲 𓏲 𓏲 𓏲 𓋒 𓏲 𓏲 𓏲 𓏲 𓏧 ˎ

Note: sorry for this short chapter, it was going to be merged with the next one, but I don't want to ruin the mood with the relatively light-hearted chapter lol- anyway here's a poll, this time i will have no mercy. There will be consequences for your choice so yeah, pick carefully, feel free to discuss in the comment section or in my server, but DO NOT start fights or attack anyone or i will block you.
(The poll will end in two weeks, good luck guys)

www.quotev.com/quiz/14937954/Make-An-Irreversible-Choice