Hello : Goodbye : Hello

Chapter 2 : The Problem With Goodbye is Hello

Nakilala ko si Gab, Gabriel Luis Sankuaier, when I was still in primary school. Bestfriend ni dad ang tatay ni Gab, at kaklase naman ni mom ang nanay nito. Dahil we're of the same age and our parents knew one another, they arranged for us to get married once the time comes.

We started going out when I was 12. Sa totoo lang, I never saw anything in him that I liked. I considered him as just a friend, or even, in some ways, a brother. Pero dahil gusto siya nang mga magulang ko, wala akong magawa noon. And to be fair with him, mabait naman siya. Maasikaso. And not to mention that he is good looking too. So it wasn't very hard to fall for him.

Two years into our relationship, I began feeling something weird. Para kasing iyung dating maasikaso at laging nandiyan na si Gab, dahan-dahang nawala. Noong una, ang iniisip ko na lang, kasi magkahiwalay na kami ng escuela noon. Mom and dad enrolled me sa isang all-girls school, samantalang siya sa isang co-ed school naman sa may QC. But the thing was, there's something in the air talaga that says na teka, may kababalaghang nangyayari.

Tapos ang dami pang mga rumours noon. Mga chismis. Na si Gab daw, playboy, maraming dine-date, lagi sa mga club. Kahit ngayon nga, ganoon pa rin ang bali-balita. But i chose to ignore all of them na lang.

Ang ingay ingay na nang mundo, dadagdagan mo pa ang ingay na naririnig mo?

At malambing din naman si Gab. He offers me gifts, flowers, and what nots. Sabi nga din nila, ang suwerte ko sa nakuha kong nobyo. And I don't have any choice but to agree. Sino nga naman ang tao na hindi suwerte sa isang tao na bukod sa guwapo na, malambing pa?

But sabi nga nila, there are always two sides in a story. There's the a-side, and the b-side. When you search for the truth, you need to check both sides din.

The truth becomes subjective, variable, or extreme. It was one of the lessons I learned sa pakikipagrelasyon kong iyon kay Gab.

***

"For the love of god, Kiki, can't you understand me?"

Away na naman ang magiging hapunan namin ngayon ni Gabriel. Lagi na lang ganito ang situation naming dalawa. Nakakarindi na din.

Kung tutuusin, simple lang naman ang pinagaawayan namin ngayon. He just forgot about our dinner date para sa anniversary namin. Last week pa namin pinagusapan iyon. He even booked a fancy restaurant para sa aming dalawa. I even asked someone to swap shifts with me. Pero biglang ayon. Ang dinner date with him, naging dinner date with my shadow. Nagbihis pa naman ako ng maayos for him,

Then kanina lang, I checked on his social media profile. He was on a beach party with some people that I didn't know. He was carrying a wine glass pa, captioned "to an amazing life". Iyon yata ang nagpa-trigger sa akin bigla-bigla. To an amazing life. Na hindi ako kasama.

It makes me feel that he was just manipulating me. That he was just draining me physically, mentally, and emotionally. Parang he didn't even love me.

He just knows that he won't get the same level of love and respect I was offering him from other people. And he simply hates seeing me love and respect another person the way I love and respect him.

Or maybe I am just overthinking things. Maybe it's my emotions getting over my sanity. Maybe the simple things that he does - taking me for granted, holding grudges for every little thing that I do, the blame game, or even iyung mga delayed replies to my messages - don't mean anything. It's just part of him being human.

Tangina, hindi ko na alam.

"Don't you realise that I am doing this for our future? Aasikasuhin ko pa ba ang anniversary natin kaysa sa isang meeting with some future investors?"