Dancing Queen - Jure Maček

Chapter 12

Now two years and a half had passed. It seems both long and extremely short. Two years that my life is in Slovenia. This was by far the best decision I made in my life. Life is easier when you live in a place you like, right? With the people you love, how could it be better?

I've had a promotion and now I dance only in Ljubljana's opera, which is really nice. I can develop all of my creativity, more than ever. And I had the best inspiration of all, just here, in my arms.

Jure was sleeping, and I expect he'll do so until noon. He moved all night long, even kicking me sometimes. Until I took him in my arms and he stood still since then.

He seemed now at peace, like a child sleeping. A small angel; looking so pure and innocent. He was my safe haven, and seeing him like this in the morning light made me smile beyond reason.

I stayed in this position for a long time, caressing his fluffy hair (I looove doing that). I looked up at the alarm clock. It was already 9 a.m. Usually I don't stay so late in bed. I'm an early bird, when Jure likes to wake up later. So, I delicately removed his arms from me and got up.

I went to the kitchen; it was Sunday today. If I kept one habit from my time in France, it was surely the Sunday breakfast. I always tried to make something better than usual, that we could appreciate slowly, as we have all our time.

I prepared some coffee for Jure, cut a fruit for me, and then, put milk to heat, for my hot chocolate (yes, I know, I'm truly a kid). I set the table beautifully, as I liked to do. I went to pick the milk, once it was hot. But I looked in the pan, and I felt totally disgusted. I put it back on the stove.

It was like I was on a boat, knowing that I'm seasick. Like my stomach was storming inside. Not really good, if you want to know. Not good at all! I ran to the bathrooms. I threw up; multiples times, not able to control it.

It was totally awful. My throat was burning. Fortunately, my head was not aching, and it seems I've no fever. Which means I'm not truly sick. I just did... a weird reaction to the milk.

***

"Amalia?" I hear Jure call from somewhere, maybe the kitchen. Fuck, I let the milk on the stove...

A few minutes had passed. I was crying, next to the toilets. Not glorious at all. I must look like a mess. Its hard to breathe; my throat is on fire and I sob so much.

"In the bathrooms," I try to say as loud as I can, so he can hear me, but it hurts.

A few second later, I hear his steps behind the door. He knocks gently.

"Amalia?" I don't answer, I can only sob, even though I try so hard to stop. "Are you okay? Can I enter?" He pushes the door a bit. He sees me on the ground crying. He opens it wide and walks towards me. He kneels to be on the same level than me. He looks so worried.

"I'm sorry." I said softly as if my voice had disappeared.

"What?" He brushes my hair out of my face. "What's wrong?"

"I...I..." The words are stuck in my throat.

He is so soft with me. He is holding my hand, and stroking my cheek. His blue eyes look at me, trying to understand, and his eyebrows are curved, sign that he's anxious. I clench my fist. He notices it. He frowns.

"What's that?" I nod negatively. "Amalia, what are you holding in your hand?"

I won't answer. He takes it from my hand, but I do not resist; I have nor the strength nor the will to do so. I feel my heart beating faster, and I look up to him.

He is frozen. His eyes are frozen on the test, positive, of course. He must know it. He breathes out loudly, and I see his shoulder falling. He closes his eyes, not saying anything. My heart skipped a beat. It was even worse that what I imagined; and it hurt even more than what I thought.

I cry harder. I try to wipe my face with my hand; not a real success. I feel terrible. My heart is aching like there was an arrow stuck in there.

He pulls me, as his hand is still holding mine, and my head falls on his shoulder. He does not say a word, but strokes my hand with his thumb, and I can hear his heart. It's a reassuring rhythm, a feeling of being home.

I don't know how long we stayed in that position. It could have been a few minutes like an hour. But at some point, Jure kissed my temple, and made me look at him.

"I'm sorry," he said, looking at me directly in the eyes. It was like the firsts time, when I was lost in his gaze. His eyes could heal everything. "I shouldn't have reacted like that." He tightened his grip on my hand. "I... I am surprised." He admitted. "And I don't know how to deal with that."

I glurped. But he gently smiled.

"I'll figure it out at some point. Please don't be sorry, you did nothing wrong love."

I took him in my arms. My tears fell, but I was relieved. I could feel his smile too; he must be relieved too. For both of us, it is hard to find the words that we needed to express ourselves. But now it is done.

"I'll need to figure it out too," I said, smiling while wiping my face.

"I guess there'll be a lot of things to be done, and to learn!"

"Yeah, but we'll deal with that another time. I'm starving!"

"Right, food above anything else!" He chuckled, getting on his feet.