NO REGRETS

Mom (From The Vault)

Mom, 

Why? 

Why me? 

Why do I have to be the one 

Why do I have to take every punch 

You chose the drugs over your family 

You left your babies to your mother 

And then there came just another 

I'm trapped in the mansion and can't find my way out 

I'm crying every day because I blame myself 

And I feel so alone because I never have 

I have pictures on top of pictures but I needed the real thing 

But I never have the strength to even sing  

You always left me behind and you hurt me 

I thought that I was one of your babies 

But I guess that you shooting up gives you more of a rush 

And I hope that the pills keep you away 

Because there is nothing more that you can say 

I was only a kid who loved their mom 

But the pills will kill you before you care some 

You told me that you support me and you hope I support you 

But how the hell am I supposed to support you when I don't remember you 

You're my mom and I'm supposed to have you here 

But you chose a man who gives you drugs and drinks beer 

I can't believe that I'm a second choice 

I always just wanted to be your baby boy 

But all along you bribed me with vintage toys 

But I just needed you here for me mom 

But I never see the real you without all of the drugs 

Now that I'm just a kid without and understanding 

Now I don't even know where I'm really standing 

I wish that you could come to my graduation but now I don't know 

And they tell me that time will heal 

But why the hell haven't I healed from this pain 

You walk away and nobody hears from you 

And the drugs kill you before anyone gets the chance 

But you don't stop even though you "tried" to 

And I lost someone that wasn't even there in the beginning 

Where are you mom? 

Why did you leave me in the pit of shame 

While everyone else's parents are cool 

All I can say is that my mom does drugs and it's shameful