Pretending | Max Verstappen

- 28 -

Zoe

I had cried, the whole damn night. I had slept only two hours before I had to prepare myself for the track. I was tired, more than that I was completely done but I would do it, one last time.

Today was Sunday, race day here in Zandvoort and my last day at the track. Tomorrow I would start a new life, but I didn't have a plan on what I should do. Probably I had to go to the head quarter one last time to sign some papers, to make everything official.

I had told Cristian already about my plan, back than at my house and he had always nodded his head but I could see that he wasn't convinced by it, he wanted to keep me at the track, at RedBull.

But that wouldn't happen, unless a miracle happens today, but that wasn't going to happen so this was my last day. More sarcastically, today was my birthday. Luckily nobody knew about it and to be honest I didn't care.

I hadn't celebrated my birthday since my parents had passed, I hadn't had anything to celebrate and today wasn't any different. I would lose my new life and would have to start completely new, without my friends from here.

When I arrived at the track I saw Lando and quickly hide behind some reporters, I didn't want to meet him, yet. He would just tell me to speak to Max and I knew I had to, I didn't want a reminder for it, so I wanted to do that first before saying good bye to Lando and Carlos, as there wouldn't be probably much time for that after the race.

Quickly and without getting talken to I arrived at my office, still a couple of hours until the race start but I had already seen many people going into the garage. After I had settled down for a bit I put my phone out.

After searching for a while I had found a cheap flight from Amsterdam back to London. It was today, in the evening after the race and I was glad about that, because I couldn't stay in this country any longer, his country.

Everything here reminded me of him, everywhere was his face or name, even in the hotel. His words replayed in my head over and over again, the whole night. I hope you can forgive me some day. Why had he said that?

He wasn't the one to blame and the media also didn't do that. They said how glad and lucky he was for splitting up with me before everything came out and that it was the right decision for him to do, so he got no hate from them.

It was all my fault, only I was the person to blame. He had told me not to fall and I tried so hard, really hard to fulfill that but I failed. Every comment from him hadn't pushed me further away, the quite opposite had happened and now I was here, in love with someone I couldn't be together with.

He should live without a thought at me, I and my life was just a mess and I was a cheap whore, the media shouldn't make fun of him for being with someone like me, I didn't want that for him. He should move on if he really cares about me.

 I forgive you. Please move on and be happy.

I quickly texted him with shaking hands, maybe with that I could skip our conversation because I already knew if we would speak I would start crying again. Back at the flight app I choose my seat and everything and was about to pay, when someone knocked on my door.

My phone fell out of my hands because I was so scared. As Christian opened slowly the door and put his head inside the room I calmed down a bit.

"Hey Zoe, do you have a minute?" he asked with a small smile on his lips.

I needed some moments to get back the charge over my body again, but as soon as I did I brushed the tears aside. My phone vibrated and I saw Max's name on the display but I quickly turned it around, so the display faced the papers on my desk.

"Sure, what do you need?" I said looking up at Christian.

"Something in the garage, something I need your expertise at."

I sighed before I stood up, leaving my phone behind on the desk, I didn't want to deal with that right now.

"One last time." I mumbled before I closed my door from the outside and followed Christian down and outside the hospitality.

Now the paddock was pretty much crowded and I even saw Max's sister and mother a couple of meters next to the garage entrance. Of course they were here, it was Max's home race. A sudden shiver overcame my body as I thought of meeting Jos somewhere here.

But since I didn't saw him and Christian had told me that he wasn't able to come to the paddock any more, I calmed down a bit. When Victoria's eyes met mine I noticed that i was starring at them.

She quickly said something to her mother without leaving her eyes from me and also Sophia turned her head in my direction. To my surprise they smiled at me and I wondered why they did it, but probably because I was wearing a RedBull shirt and they thought I was someone from the staff.

Luckily someone stepped between us and the look was broken, so I looked after Christian again, who was waiting for me at the entrance of the garage. I was nothing weird, that he needed me at the garage but I wondered why he hadn't called or sent someone to get me.

While reminding me to not forget to book that flight later I looked at the ground and followed the RedBull boss inside the garage. Only when I turned around the corner I noticed how quiet it actually was inside here, compared to other race Sundays.

This was also a reason for me to stop and look up and was immediately met with two deep blue eyes, which were starring at me. My jaw dropped instantly as I saw the picture in front of me.

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What happens here, any guesses?...