BADA LEE as Your Deranged Stalker

t e n

Did you know your eyes are deeper
than the Milky Way?
A vast expanse,
where stars and my dreams lay.

Each gaze draws me in,
like a traveler lost in space,
Drowning in their depth,
when you're near,
I lose my place.

Did you ever realize how you captivate my soul?
It's in the curve of your smile,
in stories yet untold.

Your laughter resonates,
like a melodious spree,
For your voice,
your existence,
means the universe to me.

To the moon,
I whisper my most sacred plea.
Wishing its silvery beams would help you see.

Listen closely, beneath the silence,
my heart starts to sing,
An eternal song of love for you,
an undying thing.

"Talagang gawa mo 'to, girl?!" nanlalaki ang mga mata ni Jisoo habang hawak-hawak ang papel kung sa'n ko sinulat ang poem entry ko para sa Literature subject namin.

I smiled shyly at her, "bakit ba?"

She crossed her arms and raise an eyebrow at me, "malala na talaga tama mo kay Bada Lee!" pang-aasar na naman niya.

Inagaw ko sa kanya ang papel at pinagmulatan siya ng mga mata, "Pa'no mo nasabe?!"

"Inspired na inspired kay Bada Lee 'yung poem mo, eh! Sus, eternal song of love daw. With matching pa-song dedication ka pa sa kanya, diba? Yung kay Taylor Swift? Your Anything? Kung hindi ako nagkakamali!"

"Wala namang mali sa ginagawa ko, diba? At least I have my own inspiration. She's one of the reason why I am still alive right now, kung alam mo lang, girl!" Naka-pout kong sabi.

"Wait, anong sabi mo?"

"Alin?" Shoot. I almost forgot! I haven't tell Jisoo about it.

"Don't tell me—" hindi na natuloy si Jisoo sa sasabihin dahil dumating na ang boyfriend niya at umupo ito sa tabi niya.

"Hi, hon! Kanina pa ba kayo dito?" he kissed Jisoo on the forehead. Akmang magsasalita pa sana ulit si Jisoo pero tumayo na ako para maiwasan ang kung ano mang itatanong niya.

I glanced over to the table across from me where I saw Bada. She's with her classmates and they seem really enjoying the food and chatting at the same time when she suddenly look in my direction. My heart nearly leapt when she smiled at me and wave her hand.

Am I just really fan girling Bada Lee? Or am I actually in love with her?

The moment Bada collapsed on the floor, my world just stopped.

I found myself clutching my chest, unable to stop the rapid pounding of my heart. My breathing quickens, my body trembling, and my sweating didn't seem to cease.

Napa-iling iling ako sa sarili!
I have to escape right now! This is my only chance!

Wait? I have to find the keys first! But where should I start?!

Napatingin ako sa paligid ng bahay ni Bada and then sa kanya. Mabilis ko siyang nilapitan para kapain sa mga bulsa ng damit niya ang susi kaya lang 'yung susi lang sa chain ko ang nahanap ko! Hindi ko mahanap 'yung susi sa main door!

Akmang tatayo na ako nang marinig kong umungol si Bada. Napalingon ako sa kanya saglit at naalala 'yung eksena namin sa banyo kanina.

"I-I'm sorry, I startled you"

My heart softens for Bada and all of a sudden, all of the memories I had of her came back flooding my mind and my heart starts to remind me of how much I adored her.

Mariin akong napapikit ng mga mata and a vivid memory of my dark past came rushing through my mind.

I think it would safe to say, Bada saved my life in a way I could never imagined.

Just by the thought of her existing in this world, I am fine, I am living.

I'm aware that I'm acting rather foolish right now but perhaps, if I'm really destined to die soon, I think I'd rather die in her hands.

I put the back of my hand on her forehead at napasinghap ako dahil sa sobrang init niya, halos mapaso ang balat ko!

I deep a sigh tska kinuha ang stoning hammer na nasa saheg.

Inilayo ko ito mula sa kanya at itinago sa ilalim ng lababo. I put other things on it too para hindi niya mahalatang dito ko itinago ang hammer.

I drag her body towards the long sofa and then carry her and lie her down gently. I pressed my forehead heavily as I contemplated what to do next.

I make my way to the kitchen to get a bowl and fill it with tap water and then I open the fridge to check for some ice, a lemon, and salt.

Memories rush in reminding me of how my mother used to do this for me whenever I had a fever. She would prepare a soothing concoction with ice, a hint of lemon, and a pinch of salt to help bring my fever down. I believe this remedy will be just as beneficial for Bada.

Matapos kong ma-prepare ang mga kailangan ko ay bumalik ako kay Bada. I soak a face towel in the bowl, wring it out, and gently place it on her forehead. I also grab the blanket and bedsheets from her bed to make her cover thicker, just to ensure she doesn't get cold.

I sat down on the floor next to the sofa where Bada is resting and I couldn't help but watch her in silence.

Now she is sleeping peacefully and I have faith that she'll recover soon.

As time passed, I began to feel the heaviness in my eyelids.

I didn't think about what's gonna happen next to me anymore. For now, all I want is to sleep.

Kahit sa ganitong paraan, at least nakatabi kong matulog si Bada. And if ever na hindi na ako magigising, then I'll be grateful. At least, I had the chance to take care of her.

Would you believe if I say, she alone pulled me out of my darkest thoughts? She alone prevented me from taking my own life?