BADA LEE as Your Deranged Stalker

f i f t e e n

"Your girl must be really lucky." The florist said with a smile while arranging the flowers in the bouquet I bought from her booth shop. I gave her a fake smile after paying for the it and then left the mall.

It's been over a month since I've had Kathreen Jewels in captivity and I've repeatedly come across her parents' desperate search for her in newspapers and on television. Even her friend Jisoo has been devastated. She hardly goes to school anymore because she's been assisting Kathreen's parents in their search for her.

The same applies to Jona's situation and my other victims.

I've had so many victims.
I've lost track of them already.

How many have I laid to rest? I can't recall anymore.

Why did I do this?
I see my mother in them and my compulsion to end their lives hunts me.

But when Kathreen entered the picture, everything changed.

It's difficult to put into words but the impact was visceral, an intense shift in my being that defies explanation. It was as if the universe had realigned itself, and a new, intense force had taken hold within me.

My body....

My mind...

My heart...

My soul reacts in ways I can't comprehend when it comes to her.

It's simply bewildering.

I carefully parked my motorcycle in the dimly lit garage. The bouquet I bought from the shop clutched tightly in my trembling hands.

My heart raced, thunderous beats echoing in the silence of the moment.

Approaching the door, I felt a trepidation.

With the key in hand, I inserted it into the lock and slowly turned the knob, the metal cool to the touch. As the door creaked open, a rush of emotions flooded over me, like a tidal wave of longing and uncertainty.

As I entered the living room, I saw Kathreen, there she stood in the heart of the room donned in my white oversized t-shirt.

Her delicate ankle encased in a long chain, a unique design meant solely for her.

The chain, an emblem of her captivity allows her limited movement within the confines of my house.

She turns to look at me and it felt as though my heart skipped a beat.

Why does she appear even more beautiful to me with every passing second?

She caught sight of the bouquet I held in my hands prompting me to take hesitant steps toward her, extending the flowers.

Her eyes reflected a puzzling blend of emotions, torn between surprise and a struggle to find the appropriate response.

In that moment, I found myself adrift in a sea of uncertainty, navigating the uncharted waters of a connection that felt strangely new and unexplored to me.

I couldn't understand why I had gone through the trouble of visiting the mall just to buy a bouquet of flowers....

For her.

"What's this for?" she asks with a smile that seemed to light up the entire room and cast away my dark thoughts.

I responded with a casual shrug of my shoulders before making my way towards the kitchen.

"I'm planning to cook pasta for tonight. Is there anything specific you'd like to add?"

She turn and walks toward me and the faint sound of the chains drew my attention back to her.

"I saw the news about my parents desperately looking for me... and Jisoo," she began, her words making my mind drift. "Well, that's the first time I've seen her face so swollen from crying, all because of me."

"Do you miss them?" I asked, my heart aching with the question.

Kathreen nodded slowly, her smile never leaving her face, but it held a hint of sadness.

"Alam mo ba kung ano 'yung nakakabaliw?" I fixed my gaze on her waiting for her response. "I want to stay...

here...

with you," she confessed, a tear escaping her eye.

She gently squeezed the flowers and inhaled their fragrance.

"I felt my heart leap the moment you offered me these flowers. I felt like, I am special for you.

Am I, Bada?"

Is she?

"Aren't you scared of me?" were the only words that escaped my lips.

Kathreen slowly shook her head, gently cupping my face and gazing deeply into my eyes.

Her expression filled with an intense need and desire. "I'm more scared of seeing you with someone else...

I'm more terrified of the thought of you falling in love with someone, who isn't me...

My greatest fear is being separated from you...

even more than my own life being in danger, Bada."

I scuffed and turned my back to her, aware of the pain in her expression.

"Don't lie to me," I uttered.

Then, all at once, I turned to face her gripping both her hands and gazing intently into her eyes. "Are you insane?! Are you saying you love me? Stop gaslighting yourself, Kathreen! You can't love someone like me!"

Her forehead furrowed, her face reflecting despair, broken and rejected. "Why not?" she asked.

"Why not? I've taken lives before you! You have no future with me! Choosing me will lead you to hell!" I responded, my voice heavy with the weight of my actions and the darkness I believed that surrounded me.

"Then so be it! I don't mind!" she declared, rejecting the grim reality.

I ran my fingers through my hair, frustrated. "Forget about it," I said, turning away from her again. "Just have a seat in the living room; I'll cook for dinner."

I didn't let her speak further. I simply wanted to put an end to the futile conversation and avoid any further discussion on the matter.

She didn't know what she was talking about.

No one could ever possibly love a person as evil as I am.

It's an impossible feat, one that defies reason and defies all odds.