anticipation - stray kids

the elf

anxiety

atychiphobia

(n.) the fear of failure; fear of not being good enough

bag of bones - mitski

"i'm tired of this searching, would you let me go?"

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

ever since he was little, he had always loved the river that ran next to his childhood home.

the sounds of gushing water and wind dancing through the trees had always had a calming effect on him.

his village, a beautiful place full of judgmental stares and whispers, was never really all that homely.

he could never have a home in that place.

he knew that, his parents knew that, the whole village knew that.

they were just waiting until he was of age before kicking him out. his parents never protested this proposal, seemingly waiting on baited breath for the day. the only thing that stopped them from getting it over and done with was the villages inability to go against the law. everyone knew, 'in order to be banished, one must be of age,' was the only thing keeping him safe.

for he was cursed, the black sheep of his village. forever to be blamed for the mishaps, illnesses, and issues that the village endured.

the river was his refuge, his escape.

a place where he could be himself, away from the condescending elders and youngsters of the village.

after a long day, he'd always come running. that was until the day the river dried up.

it was his twentieth birthday, one year until his official banishment. his parents had ignored him as always, giving all of their devoted attention to their other son, the golden child. he'd spent all day in his 'bedroom' - it was more of a prison - before running out when his designated time outside came.

he'd immediately booked it to the river, ignoring the comment and looks, leaving his parent's house behind.

he reached the outskirts of the village in no time, turning onto the thin bush trail he'd created the first time he'd 'escaped'. he tripped on a tree root, the same one as always, before catching himself and lightly giggling at his own clumsiness.

he slowed down to a jog when he reached his spirit tree, jumping up and tapping on of the lower hanging branches. despite the village's obvious dislike for him, they hadn't yet stooped as low as cutting down his spirit tree.

he strained his ears for the sound of running water, frowning slightly when he couldn't hear it. he stopped jogging, walking now as the river bank became visible.

a strangled gasp fell from his mouth when he saw it.

sandpaper dry rocks and sand. trampled bush, uprooted trees. 

where was the river?

that was the day jeongin decided to run away, for good this time.

and he never looked back.

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

these are kind of mini prologues, basically explaining backstories, reasons for behaviours and such things

each 'main' character will had one

- hyunwaffles