Why Don't You Just Kiss Me Then.

Couldn't Be

Ancient love. . .

Then I was again thinking. I can't be in love.
Can I?
Lilia is getting into my head way too much, I need to stop.
Okay, but hanging out with Thomas just to see how I feel wouldn't hurt, would it. . .?
"Hey Thommy."
"Hey Lama."
"Wanna hang out?"
He looks at me weird, dark eyes boring into me.
"We always hang out. We came here together, remember?"
"Well, yeah, but we haven't done things with just you and me for a while, have we?"
"Eh, I guess not. Okay, I'll grab my bathing suit, and we can go to the beach."
"We can have a beach adventure!"
He laughs a little.
"Yes, Amabel, we can have a beach adventure."
I smile and dash up the stairs to my room, pulling on my one-piece so that we can race.
My aunt happens to have a golf cart, and she TOTALLY ships us (ugh), so she let us use the tiny blue thing.
"Let's go!" I shout excitedly, jumping into the drivers seat.
"Hey now, what do you think you're doing?" Thomas asks, putting a sassy hand on his hip.
"I'm driving." I say, dangling the key in front of his face.
"Uh, no."
"Um, yes."
He gives me a death glare and I yank the keys back when he launches himself onto my lap to get it. I remember what I'm testing as I laugh and my heart skips a beat. I couldn't be. . . Could I?
After wrestling for the keys for a good half hour, I put my knowledge of Thomas's ticklishness to use and I win the keys.
"No fair!"
"Yes fair!" I say, grinning as I back out of the driveway, motioning for Thomas to get in before zipping off.
"So, water today Amabel?" Thomas asks, taking his shirt off to reveal what all the fan girls seem to be obsessed with. . . His stomach.
I mean, it's nice and all. Nothing I haven't seen on him before. Abs, yes, calm down please. Back muscles, yes, as I said, please calm down.
I couldn't be.
"Yes water. I wore my one peice for a reason." I say, removing my coverup and spraying some sunscreen on my arms.
I am so relaxed with him, so how could I be in love? Isn't love supposed to be undying passion, crazy butterflies, and all that cliché jazz? At least that's what it says in movies and books.
But love seems so ancient to me. I've heard so much about it that it seems almost. . .unreal. Impossible and nonexistent. Especially love with Thomas.
"Hurry up." Thomas whines, that adorable British accent causing shivers to go down my spine (sarcasm, come on).
"Hey now, some people need sunscreen. You know that I'll look like a tomato. Do you want me to be a tomato, Thomas?"
"Yes." Thomas says, nodding his head vigorously and causing his hair to flop around on his forehead.
I roll my eyes. "Being a tomato is not good Thomas. Don't be a tomato, Thomas."
"Thomas the tomato!" Thomas says, flinging his arms above his head like a weirdo. My weirdo.
"Okay, you can chill, I'm done."
"Yay!" Thomas shouts, and lifts me over his shoulder, running toward the water.
Between my laughs, I manage to say, "I can walk, you know!" Before getting tossed into the water. I stand up and I am faced with his brown eyes.
Then I can't move.
Why can't I move.
I'm stuck, just like that time in my bedroom (no, stop it. Stop thinking like that). Thomas is looking back, and it's like we're frozen in space. I can't be.
"How's Matt?" Thomas says after a while. This shakes me out of my trance and I give myself a mental slap for being so dumb. I back away from him, realizing how close we are.
"He's good."
"You haven't talked to him in a while."
"We've been texting."
"Oh." Thomas says, nodding, then looking at me out of the corner of his eye unsurely. I wince inwardly, but he smiles, breaking the tension before diving into the waves. I sigh nervously.
For how long have I liked him?
Does he know?
What if he knows?
Panick.
We race a few times and argue quite a lot before deciding that we have equal swimming skills. And then we are walking together and talking, looking for a place to eat.
We talk like best friends do, not lovers.
But aren't lovers also best friends?
I couldn't be. . .
We finally find a little sandwich shop right by the beach, and we share a sub.
So different, but at the same time exactly the same.
Is Lilia sure that he loves me? How long has he loved me? Did I know that he loved me? How could he love me?
And more importantly, what will I do about Matt?
I have to break up with him, don't I.
I couldn't be. . .

HEYYYYYY BABES
ITS SUMMAAAAAAAAA
R U EXCITED ABOUT THIS CHAPTER?
GOOD.
GOOD IM GLAD.
HOPEFULLY I CAN GET BACK ON A NORMAL UPDATING SCHEDUAL
WE'LL SEE.
SORRY I DONT HAVE MUCH TO SAY THIS AUTHORS NOTE IVE GOT A PERSONAL (KINDA GOOD I GUESS) THING GOING ON SOO DONT WORRY ABOUT ME IM OKAY
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH HAVE A GOOD WHATEVER YOURE HAVING (DAY, NIGHT, CHEESBURGER)
BYEEEEEE!