Why Don't You Just Kiss Me Then.

I Killed Him

Broken, broken, broken heart, when will take just go away. . .
        I walk away from the house quickly, not turning to look back as Thomas shouts my name from my Aunt's porch, I don't care, I don't care.
"I can't care. . ."
        Not thinking about where I'm going, I take several turns to make Thomas' voice leave me, before I realize that I'm walking to the beach. That's not a bad place at seven in the morning, right?
        I walk several minutes before I finally reach the sand, the coldness of the morning making me wrap Thomas' jacket closer around me. Ironic, right? I find a nice sand dune to sit on and cry for a while, getting looks of pity from the array of early-morning runners finishing their workout. I wish that I thought of my earbuds before leaving the house, music makes everything better. I decide to turn it on anyways, not being able to care enough about the other people on the beach to be polite. I decide to turn on a cover of "Broken, Broken, Broken Heart" by a youtuber I like, Kickthepj, to match the theme of my feelings, and I continue to sob into my arms.
Why doesn't music make this better?
The jacket smells of him, which just kills me more as the knife stabs at my heart.
Time begins to move in waves as I watch the sea spill it's salty tears over the shore, similar to the water constantly streaming over my cheeks.
I never thought it was possible to hurt this much.
        I have my head buried in my arms when he finds me, and I don't realize that he has until someone sits beside me. I don't want to look up, to show him my blotchy crying face, even though  he's seen it many times before, but I force myself to meet his brown eyes. He's looking at me with pain and regret evident in his features, and I wonder if he's hurting just as much over me as I am over him. He doesn't say anything at first, and we watch the shoreline together for a few minutes, just sitting together. Then I feel his arm snake around my waist, and I understand. I look up at him, eyes watering again, and collapse into his arms, accepting his apology. I always have, and I always will.
"I'm so sorry Lam-"
"I know, Thomas. I am too." I say, resting in his arms as I pull myself together. When we finally pull away from each other, he looks deep into my eyes, and I feel like he can see my entire soul.
"I-I. . . really want to kiss you right now, Amabel." His words shock me, he just laid his feelings out in the open. He was vulnerable. And I could metaphorically kill him in that moment if I wanted to.
I almost let him before I pull away.

HEY ITS ANOTHER CHAPTER *BUDUM CHA!*
I ALREADY SAID IM SORRY AND I GAVE YOU TWO CHAPTERS IN A ROW AND THIS TOO SO AHAHAHA
I LOVE YOU GUYS
HAVE A GREAT WHATEVR YOURE HAVING (DAY, NIGHT, CHEESEBURGER)
BYEEEEE