Harry Styles' P.A

As it was

After 23 years of endless suffering, constantly fighting depression and receiving one emotional blow after the other, I was finally happy. Despite my flaws, my insecurities and everything else, I somehow managed to have this amazing man love me. I had resisted him for years, fearing that if he knew how dark my head could get, he would leave me like everyone else had done. But he didn't. So when he proposed to me for the third time, I decided to let go of my past fears and take the plunge. I said yes.

Our wedding was perfect. I felt like a princess, I was surrounded by the small circle of people I cared about and my inlaws adored me. My husband adored me. I never felt as happy as in that moment. Untill our son was born. And I looked at the little perfect boy in my arms and thought I couldn't get happier. But before my babyboy could even walk, I was pregnant again. Despite all the horror stories I heard about pregnancies and giving birth, my pregnancies were pure bliss. Giving birth was a breeze.
Our second baby was a girl. Born with the cutest pout on her rosy lips,big blue eyes like her brother's and a head full of blonde curls straight out of the womb. I couldn't imagine a baby looking more perfect. And I felt my heart swell to make room for all the extra love I had for this little angel.

A year later we bought our first home. The kid's rooms were perfect. The kitchen adorned with high-tech cooking gear and the best oven we could afford. A garden where we made a playground and watched as our toddler boy ran trough the garden with his babysister unsteadily stepping around on the grass. It was perfect.
Everything was perfect.

Untill it wasn't.

I never understood why transport coorporations forced their truckdrivers to make impossible deadlines. It was dangerous, the truckdrivers were overworked and tired and accidents happened too often. All for the sake of money. No amount of money was worth risking lives for. But it never happened close to home. Yet.

We were all in the car, on our way back home from visiting my inlaws. The kids loved them so much. I loved them too. My parents got divorced when I was in my teens and I never spoke to my father again when I found out he had cheated on my mom. He never cared about me anyway. My mom remarried, but around their fifth anniversary my stepfather suddenly died from a heartdisease. My mom became very quickly irritated and very depressed, and though I understood and loved her, I couldn't handle it very well. My inlaws were like foster parents to me. I loved them like we were related by blood and they loved me as if I was their own daughter. So we tried to visit often, even though we had to drive three hours just to get there.

The kids had fallen asleep in the backseat on the way home and as my husband drove I was looking out the window. We were tired too, though not so tired that it was unsafe to drive. Just tired enough to spend the ride home in comfortable silence. When we came closer to our hometown we had to stop for a traffic light. It turned green almost immediately since we were the only ones at the cross-section, but just as my husband accelerated and entered the cross-section, a truck raced trough a red light and onto the cross-section. I could only scream my husbands name, and then the truck slammed into us and everything went black

....

I regained my conciousness in a sleeplike state. I felt as if I was being pulled down into a deep sleep, so drowsy. There was a faint rythmic beeping sound next to me that I recognised as a heart monitor. I struggled to open my eyes as I fought the drowsyness, but eventually I managed. The brightness of the hospitalroom hurt my eyes, my head. I couldn't move much either. I turned my head slowly untill I saw the brownhaired head of my mother, resting on the matress of my hospital bed, her hands clutching my left hand as my right hand seemed to be completely full of needles and wires.

"Mom?"

My voice was soft and hoarse, barely more than a whisper and I groaned at the soreness in my troath. My mother sleepily lifted her head and looked at me. In a split second she was in tears.