SOTUS: Make The Best Of It (The Graduation Series)

Coping

''Happy Birthday, P'Arthit.''

The video freezes and lags for ten seconds and although it doesn't help, Arthit clicks impatiently at his mouse. When the connection is finally restored, he sees Kongpob holding up a small birthday cake with a 'Happy Birthday' topper and the right amount of candles signifying Arthit's age. He's even got a silly party hat on, all grins as he holds the cake up to the screen. On the cake, ''HBD, my น่ารัก boyfriend'' was written in green icing.

Arthit takes a screenshot of it because of how just fucking adorable the cake is.

And Kongpob, of course.

It's exactly 12 midnight in Thailand, which means it's 1 in the afternoon where Kongpob is. He can see the golden sunlight streaming in through the windows of Kongpob's apartment, a contrast to Arthit's darkened bedroom since he's got the blinds drawn.

''Thank you, Kongpob.'' 

There's an unspoken longing that both of them can feel through the screen. Despite the kinda shitty resolution of the video because of Arthit's horrible internet connection (of all days it chooses to act up, it just had to be today), he still feels his heart skip a beat at how handsome Kongpob is in just a white t-shirt and sweats, his black glasses resting at the top of his head.

''Make a wish, P'Arthit.'' 

Not one to deny Kongpob, Arthit clasps his hands together and closes his eyes. I pray for both our happiness, for Kongpob to always be safe where he is and for him to return to me safe and sound. Satisfied with his wish, Arthit opens his eyes once more and lifts up his own small birthday cake to extinguish the candles. It takes Arthit two puffs and Kongpob claps when he's done.

''I'm sorry I couldn't make it back home for your birthday, P'.''

The past nine months of being apart hasn't exactly been a walk in the park of the couple. The time difference was proving to be the biggest obstacle for them, which meant a lot of late nights for Arthit. There were days where both of them would just be too exhausted from their own responsibilities that all they could manage was simply texts. Or Kongpob would fall asleep at his desk waiting for Arthit to call him, completely missing the older male's call out of exhaustion. 

''Eh, it's okay.'' Arthit folds his arms across the table. ''Besides, you're coming to visit at the end of the year anyway.''

''How much do you miss me, P'Arthit?''

Arthit smiles sleepily at the camera, finding it silly that Kongpob always has to ask him this question each time they call.

''Too much.'' Arthit admits quietly, desperately wishing that there wasn't so much distance between them. 

One would think that Arthit would get used to the loneliness after a couple of months. Yet, till today, he still dreads returning to an empty apartment. Sometimes, he almost expects to see Kongpob waiting for him in the living room or bedroom, or to be woken up by his boyfriend's alarm blaring a Getsunova song at exactly five in the morning. It gets worse with each passing day that there are days where Arthit resorts to staying over at either Toota's or Prem's just so he can avoid returning home. 

''It's lonely being here without you, P. There's no one to nag me about my lack of tolerance for spicy food. No one to cuddle or kiss too."

''At least there's no one here to hog all the blankets.'' Arthit doesn't mean that, of course. If anything, he misses being able to just roll over in the middle of the night to have Kongpob hold him close.

Another yawn comes on and Arthit's already struggling to keep his eyes open. He's had a particularly long day at  work today with back to back site visits that had eaten up so much of  his time. He would admit that he's throwing himself into work just to avoid the void of loneliness and longing eating him up from the inside. When Arthit is kept busy, he doesn't have time to think about how much he misses his boyfriend.